Food allergies are no joke. The American College of Allergy, Asthma, & Immunology (ACAAI) reports peanut allergies are among the most severe, often triggering anaphylaxis, a condition that can be fatal without immediate treatment.
Today's Original Poster (OP) found herself in a very frustrating situation after realizing that her mother-in-law doesn't take her son's severe peanut allergy seriously. In fact, she's convinced it's all in the OP's head.
More info: Reddit
When you see that your mother-in-law doesn't take your child's severe peanut allergy seriously, you may have to keep her out
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The author described her parenting style as more gentle, while her mother-in-law's style is more strict and old-fashioned
Image credits: Pnutproblemz
Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Her son has a severe peanut allergy; however, her mother-in-law believes it's not real and that it can be cured through exposure
Image credits: Pnutproblemz
Image credits: spontaneous_igloo / Reddit (not the actual photo)
Now, she wants to take the child to a baseball game where there are peanuts everywhere, but she insists he will do just fine
Image credits: Pnutproblemz
Image credits: katemangostar / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author's husband believes she's overreacting about their child's allergy and sides with his mom despite knowing the dangers
Image credits: Pnutproblemz
Image credits: shurkin_son / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She gave an update on the situation, emphasizing that she's not trying to demonize her mother-in-law, but keep her son safe
Image credits: Pnutproblemz
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She also added that she has asked her mother-in-law if she's willing to go with her to a family doctor, but she hasn't received a response
Image credits: Pnutproblemz
Her husband, on the other hand, still refuses to take things seriously, which leaves the author considering legal actions
The mother-in-law and the OP never really see eye to eye. While her mother-in-law is a bit more of an old-school and tough love and hardline parenting believer, the OP is all about gentle and soft parenting. Her son was diagnosed with a life-threatening peanut allergy, so he has to use an EpiPen.
However, her mother-in-law believes that the allergy is fake and that it will go away with time after some exposure to the allergen despite the OP explaining to her that it could be deadly. She threw the child's EpiPen aside and insisted that kids “didn’t have allergies” in her day. Besides, if something did happen, she’d simply take him to the hospital. The OP was horrified at this.
One day, when she refused to let her mother-in-law take her son out without his EpiPen, she played the victim, calling the OP's husband and telling him that the OP had called her an "unfit grandmother." Instead of backing her, her husband sided with his mom, stating that his mom meant no harm and that she was just overreacting. He also insisted that she apologize to his mom.
Now, her mother-in-law wants to take the child to a baseball game—a place with peanuts everywhere. When the OP asked her to use the stadium’s peanut-free zone, her mother-in-law insisted that her child would be fine. At this point, the OP is tired of her mother-in-law's actions towards her son. Her husband, still in full "Mama's Boy" mode, thinks she's being unreasonable.
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In order to get some professional insight into the severity of anaphylaxis, Bored Panda reached out to medical doctor Petrina Uukule. When asked what happens to the body during an anaphylactic reaction, she explained that allergies play up when the body mistakenly identifies a substance as dangerous and releases chemicals like histamine to fight it.
"This causes the blood vessels to dilate and airways to constrict, which makes one breathe with difficulty," Uukule explained. She also stated that face and throat swelling can also block the airways, which can lead to death. She emphasized that it can escalate rapidly within minutes; therefore, it shouldn't be taken lightly or intentionally induced.
Uukule clarified that the idea that one can "cure" a child by exposing them to allergens is a myth. Rather, repeated exposure could very well lead to an accumulation of more severe and more dangerous reactions. In her words, "Since it's genetic, exposure can't cure them."
We went further to ask what the OP can do in this situation, especially since her mother-in-law doesn't seem to understand the gravity of the allergy. She suggested that what the mother-in-law needs is awareness and health education through a family doctor. She added that if, after this, she is still non-compliant, the OP must realize that she can't leave her child under her mother-in-law's care.
Netizens shared their firsthand experiences with anaphylaxis, detailing how excruciating and traumatic it can be. They also emphasized that the OP's husband's refusal to stand up to his mother makes him a terrible father, and that she's not in the wrong for prioritizing her child's safety over family harmony.
What would you do if you were in the OP's shoes? Would you let your mother-in-law see your child only under supervision, or cut off visits entirely? We would love to hear your thoughts!
Netizens affirmed that the author isn't being unreasonable for wanting to ensure that her son is safe from danger
