Life changes when a person becomes a parent; sometimes, so does their sense of entitlement, which might result in some troublesome situations.
The redditor u/Tenacitybrit9 met a parent with such a sense at the local swimming pool. The man was relaxing by the poolside when he was approached by a manager with a message from an entitled father. Even though the redditor didn’t put fuel to the flame, the police were soon involved too. Scroll down to find the full story below.
Below you will also find Bored Panda’s interview with the OP, who was kind enough to answer a few of our questions.
A heightened sense of parent entitlement can become the cause of all sorts of troublesome situations
Image credits: Kampus Production (not the actual photo)
This man wanted to relax by the pool, but his plans were altered by an entitled father
Image credits: Kindel Media (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Steward Masweneng (not the actual photo)
Image credits: u/Tenacitybrit9
The OP was upset with the entitled parent’s accusations but grateful for the support from the online community
During a recent interview with Bored Panda, the OP shared that the most upsetting part about the situation was being accused of such an awful thing. “Not only was there no evidence to suggest such a thing, but this guy made no attempt to communicate that he was upset with me beyond a threat.”
But he was grateful for the support the Reddit community provided him, offering everything from sympathy to detailed legal advice, he said. “I was preparing for a more mixed response when I first posted that story, but the overwhelming number of positive comments was incredible.”
Fellow redditors seemingly also shared their ideas of what such parent entitlement stems from. “In this particular case, many of my commenters believe this man was projecting his own horrible tendencies onto me, using me as a target to justify his own thoughts and beliefs; I agree with this assessment.
“In general, I believe there can be a vast number of reasons: trying to live through one’s child, a belief that simply being a parent makes them automatically above others in life, thinking the world owes them for adding to the population, or maybe even being driven insane by raising kids that they might not been ready to have?” the OP suggested, sharing why he thinks some parents might have a heightened sense of entitlement.
There are numerous reasons why some people develop a heightened sense of entitlement
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A sense of entitlement can quite often become the reason for conflict or troublesome situations; and it’s not difficult to see why. When a person expects special treatment for reasons unknown or feels inherently deserving of certain things, it doesn’t really put them on the list of the most pleasant people to be around.
When entitled people treat the world as if it owes them something, it might make others wonder where such an attitude comes from. While there is arguably no one right answer to this, BetterHelp suggests that there are several theories regarding reasons for developing a sense of entitlement, such as personality disorders, matters related to overcompensating for past wrongs, or parental influence.
BetterHelp pointed out that a heightened sense of entitlement can be a result of maltreatment, unfairness, or neglect experienced in the past. Rooted in the feeling of victimhood or resentment related to the events, such a sense can manifest itself later in life in the form of unreasonable expectations. For example, a child who’s never experienced understanding growing up can expect it from others to an excessive level as an adult.
A sense of entitlement can also be developed as a result of narcissistic personality or antisocial personality disorders (NPD and ASPD respectively). People with such disorders tend to view themselves as superior to others, which typically goes hand in hand with exaggerated self-esteem and an unfair view of other people’s worth.
Entitlement often stems from the inability to properly process emotions
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In a piece for Psychology Today, a Denver-based marriage and family therapist, Karyl McBride, explained that entitlement is the “unreasonable expectation that one should receive special treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations”, adding that for narcissists, their needs come before anyone else’s. She suggested that that is because narcissists are often raised in families where feelings are denied and projected instead of dealt with.
In such cases, the child’s emotions are not attended to and they might not know how to process them themselves. When their own emotions are not dealt with, it’s no surprise that they can’t have empathy for others. The inability to tune in to their own feelings can then be brought into adulthood, which might result in narcissistic behaviors or a sense of entitlement, especially when a person is stressed or overwhelmed.
BetterHelp also suggested that the way a child is raised from an early age can affect their sense of entitlement as a grown-up. For instance, if the parents constantly say yes, the child is likely to feel entitled to everything they want, which, years later, might not be met with the expected outcomes from the adults around them.
It’s unclear what was the basis for the sense of entitlement of the father the OP met at the swimming pool, but he felt that his wish for the man to leave the premises was to be met with no resistance. And even though the redditor did leave, the manager of the pool later revealed that it was the entitled parent they considered more troublesome than the OP.
Fellow redditors shared their views in the comments, the OP replied to some of them
