People who get along with their in-laws are truly blessed because as many examples show, mother-in-laws can be unbearable, especially to their daughter-in-laws. Psychologists have explored this topic and have a couple of explanations, but knowing the reasons doesn’t make bearing the mistreatment any easier.
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But petty revenge helps with the short bursts of enjoyment knowing that you made the other person feel like you do. This woman didn’t really plan an act of revenge, but when she realized she'd made her MIL jealous when she keeps doing it to her DIL on purpose, it was a good feeling.
More info: Reddit
This woman's mother-in-law keeps wanting to make her jealous of what she owns and then explodes when she's having fun without her
Image credits: Sascha Kohlmann (not the actual image)
The Original Poster’s (OP) mother-in-law likes to say the stereotypical “she took my son away.” Her view fits the saying “A daughter is a daughter all of her life, but a son is a son ’til he takes him a wife.” So she hates the wife who, in her eyes, took away her son, because it is impossible to be a son and a husband at the same time.
The averse feelings manifest themselves with nagging and making the daughter-in-law a target. The example talked about in this story includes the mother-in-law’s desire to make the OP jealous of the life she has.
The way the MIL tries to make her DIL jealous is by sending pictures of the things she can afford and will say "isn't it great"
Image credits: u/TinySkyscraper_3222
MIL will send pictures of the new things she can afford such as cars, a house and designer goods and will even say “isn’t it great I can afford all this.” Bored Panda was interested in what could cause this desire and contacted Terri Apter, psychologist and author of What Do You Want from Me? Learning to Get Along with In-Laws.
She told us that actually, “it is unwise to assume in any particular case that the mother-in-law's aim is to instill jealousy in the daughter-in-law.” The psychologist believes that the story said too little to objectively assess the situation, but still gave a theoretical reason: ”sometimes a person who has low self esteem may try to bolster themselves by seeing that others are jealous of them.”
Not only does the MIL send pictures of things she buys, but last summer, she invited her other son, his girlfriend and the girlfriend’s sister on a trip. The woman paid for everything, including souvenirs, but then was sending pictures saying that she knows the OP is jealous.
She also invited her other son, his girlfriend and the girlfriend's sister on a summer vacation, sending photos saying "I bet you're so jealous"
Image credits: u/TinySkyscraper_3222
Image credits: Bennilover (not the actual image)
Well, OP’s parents were also going on vacation a few months later and they invited their daughter and their son-in-law. The couple went along and MIL was furious. She had a proper tantrum because she thought that her son was being taken away from her.
She was also mad because she felt that the couple was favoring OP’s family over hers. Terri Apter admits that “so-called blood relatives (even if they are not genetically linked, as in adoption) are very likely to have a stronger pull.” So it is understandable why the woman would want to spend time with her parents.
But the psychologist adds, “The problem is not that you feel more attached to your own family than to your in-laws; the problem may be that your partner or the partner's parents cannot tolerate that. Then they make excessive demands, or criticize your loyalty.”
Then she turned around and was blaming her DIL and son for favoritism towards the DIL's parents because they went on vacation with them
Image credits: u/TinySkyscraper_3222
It’s also weird that the MIL was so mad because it was she who didn’t invite either her son nor daughter-in-law on the trip, but then was hurt because they could have fun without her. Which also looks like favoritism on her end.
Reading the story, it seems very clear and obvious, but Terri Apter explains that “People who show favoritism often are unaware of how obvious it is to others. If they do notice it themselves, they think it is easily ‘fixed’ by complimenting another person,” and adds “their attempt to cover up is also obvious - and infuriating.”
Her son was done with her, although they didn't have a good relationship to begin with, and decided to move. The best part is that his wife's parents live there
Image credits: u/TinySkyscraper_3222
Image credits: averie woodard (not the actual image)
But not all hope is lost because after this tantrum, OP and her husband decided by mutual agreement that they will be moving 5 hours away from the MIL to OP’s parents’ city, so at least the woman has her husband by her side. Also, in the comments, she mentioned that he doesn’t even get along with his mom, and that is why she would text the OP instead.
People in the comments were pretty horrified by MIL's behavior and were glad they found a solution
