They say a grandmother’s love is like no other. It is often described as enduring, comforting, and unconditional, as all she wishes is to see her grandchildren happy and successful in life.
This woman, however, seemed to have a slightly more twisted definition of what grandmotherly love meant. Her attachment to her late grandson was so strong that she stole his ashes right from her daughter-in-law’s home.
Her actions nearly caused tension in the family, as she tried to play it off like it was no big deal. The boy’s mom obviously didn’t see it that way, as she shares the story with the Reddit community.
Some grandparents go overboard with their show of love toward their grandchildren
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A woman discovered that her late son’s ashes were missing from her home
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She later learned that it was her mother-in-law, the boy’s grandmother, who took the child’s urn
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Grandmothers develop a strong attachment to their grandkids because of the relationship dynamic
Grandmothers, in particular, are known to do whatever it takes to develop a strong bond with their grandkids. It’s why many resort to spoiling the child, much to the distress of their parents.
According to licensed clinical psychologist turned author and life consultant Leon F. Seltzer, PhD, it’s due to the relationship dynamic. Since children are naturally attached and dependent on their parents as biological caretakers, grandparents try to “earn” that relationship.
“This is why grandparents—and particularly grandmothers—will go considerably out of their way to try to get their grandkids to bond with them,” Seltzer wrote in an article for Psychology Today.
Seltzer added that grandparents may overreach at times, forcing their own children to set boundaries on how much they will allow the pampering and spoiling to persist.
It is likely what happened in the story where the grandmother’s desire to “spend time” with her late grandson seemed to have clouded her judgment, so much so that she resorted to stealing his ashes.
Many people have likely experienced similar scenarios, albeit less toxic and without the blatant theft. Experts describe this type of grandparent as “The Line Crosser,” where boundaries are seemingly forgotten.
Dealing with this type of grandparent requires a firm approach, according to licensed clinical social worker Brooke Schwartz, LCSW. In her article for Choosing Therapy, Schwartz urges “dropping the rope in trying to meet their expectations.”
“Be realistic with yourself about what you’re actually capable of and willing to do,” she wrote, adding that clear communication on why such boundaries are in place is a must to avoid confusion.
In this case, the woman was justified in filing a police report against her mother-in-law. It shows that she isn’t taking such disrespect lightly. Their relationship may not be the same, but it isn’t on her. It changed the moment her MIL stole the ashes to accommodate her selfish needs.
Commenters were adamant about pressing charges against the grandmother
The woman provided an update to the story after reading comments
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As it turned out, the problem within the family only worsened
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The woman was later surprised by a package from her mother-in-law
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Her MIL's half-hearted efforts to reconcile only made her feel worse
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Commenters didn't hold back with their reactions upon learning about the new information
The author later revealed that she pushed through with filing the police report
Image source: marifleur