Getting married to the love of your life is the most wonderful experience, but it can also be very overwhelming as well. This is especially true if family members begin throwing tantrums or start acting up instead of being supportive.
This is what one woman experienced on her wedding day when her mother told her to be much less happy in order to make her jealous older sister feel better. This left the joyful bride feeling hurt as she couldn’t believe her mother would be putting her sister first yet again, on her special day.
More info: Reddit
A wedding is supposed to be about the bridal couple, yet entitled family members and friends might try to make the day about them
Image credits: freepik / Magnific (not the actual photo)
The poster shared that even though her mother was the younger sibling, she ended up getting engaged before her older sister, since she met the man of her dreams in high school
Image credits: wirestock / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Unfortunately, on her wedding day, the bride had to put everything aside to comfort her elder sibling because she was jealous of her getting married first
Image credits: Alexander Mass / Pexels (not the actual photo)
When the resentful older sister broke down in tears and ran off, her mother confronted the bride and told her to be less happy in order to appease her sibling
Image credits: savvyleigh13
The bride refused to dampen her joy for her sister’s sake and confronted her mom about it, especially since her older sibling was the golden child
The poster shared that her mom met her future husband early on, and they began dating. That’s why, even though she was the youngest of two girls, she still decided to get married regardless of the fact that her older sibling was still single.
According to research, it used to be a tradition for older children to marry first, with the other siblings following that order. This practice also imposed a sort of social hierarchy among the kids, which is why it was less acceptable for one sibling to get engaged out of that order.
This, combined with jealousy, was probably why the OP’s aunt was trying her best to make her sister’s wedding about her. Even on the actual day, she kept crying and throwing tantrums, so her sibling, the bride, had to calm her down and attend to her needs instead of enjoying her special day.
It can be tough to deal with a loved one who always tries to be the center of attention, which is why psychologists emphasize the importance of establishing boundaries sooner rather than later. The problem with such folks is that they often don't realize how their behavior affects others, which is why it’s best to talk to them about it.
Image credits: freepik / Magnific (not the actual photo)
The poster also shared that apart from having to confront her elder sister, the bride was also pulled aside by her mother and told to be less happy. The older woman expected her daughter not to publicize her joy so much because of her sister’s jealousy and resentment over not already being married.
This left the bride feeling heartbroken because all her life, her toxic mother had always favored her golden child sibling. The woman had also been treated like second best and had been dissuaded from going to college because of her learning disabilities, which made her feel bad and less than her sister.
This imbalanced dynamic can be tough to deal with, and experts explain that it can slowly lead to family members resenting each other. This favoritism from parents can pit siblings against each other and ruin their relationships over time, unless things are made equal between them.
That’s why the bride finally blew up at her mother and confronted her about the unfair treatment she was giving them both. She told her mom that she was not going to hide her joy or pretend to be different just because her sister was feeling bad. Even though that must have been tough to do, it must have helped set boundaries with her toxic family.
What do you think is the best way to deal with enabling relatives or golden-child siblings? We’d love to hear your thoughts and opinions on this story.
Folks were shocked by the entitlement of the older sister and were proud of the poster’s mom for putting her foot down
