I've dreamed of going to Disneyland since I was a child, and unfortunately, that dream hasn't come true yet. Well, now the dream has become more of a plan - for my own children. However, I'm well aware that they have their own dreams, so I won't force my personal vision of what that dream should be on them.
Some people, however, have carried their love of Disney and its fandom into their mid-50s - like the parents of the user u/ash_etch_1928, today's narrator, as they go there several times a year. They also try to instill this love in their daughter by any means necessary… Well, let's just cut to the chase and go on reading.
More info: Reddit
Having a dream is really great for anyone, but imposing your own dream onto others around you is not so great
Image credits: taylor gregory / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The author of the post is a mom of 2 toddlers, and they're planning a wedding with her longtime boyfriend in May
Image credits: kristina_igumnova / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author's parents are both in their mid-50s and have been avid Disney fans throughout their entire lives
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author's mom has been trying to involve her in a joint trip to Disneyland, but going to a theme park with two toddlers isn't a great idea
Image credits: ash_etch_1928
Recently, the mom sent the author an Xmas gift - Disneyland tickets for the whole family, but they expire in May when they had plan their wedding to be, and this rather annoyed the woman
So, the Original poster (OP) says that she and her partner are in their mid-30s, with two toddlers after ten years in a relationship. They're planning a wedding in May and, of course, have invited the woman's parents. But it turns out they have their own plans for May - and their daughter plays a key role in these plans.
The point is that the author's parents have been avid Disney fans since childhood and have been involved in fandom throughout their entire lives. The couple is well-off enough that they can afford to go to Disneyland several times a year and have fun there. They've tried to involve the daughter and her bro in their hobby, but they're both rather lukewarm.
Over the past few years, the parents have repeatedly tried to invite the author, her kids, and her partner on a joint trip to Disneyland, but she always declined. The problem is that bringing toddlers to the theme park is far from enjoyable, and the mom wanted the children to go when they're older and able to fully appreciate all the attractions.
And so, our heroine recently received Disneyland tickets for the whole family from her mother for Christmas - except they were only valid until May, when they were planning their wedding. Now the woman is torn between what to do: refuse her mother's truly generous and costly gift or try to somehow make it through both events, inevitably losing the pleasure of both?
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
"In fact, every gift is different," says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, with whom Bored Panda contacted for a comment here. "There are gifts that genuinely bring joy to the recipient, and then there are those whose sole purpose is to flatter the giver's ego. Apparently, in this situation, the latter is the case."
According to the expert's words, this is essentially an attempt at narcissism on the part of the author's mother. On the one hand, if her daughter accepts the gift, her mother's long-held dream will come true. On the other hand, if she refuses, she will have the moral right to resent her daughter, embodying the so-called "victim mentality."
"Ultimately, it's up to this woman alone to decide, and no one else except her partner for sure. The problem here most likely lies in unresolved issues in the mother-daughter relationship, which could be helped by quality and timely therapy, not a joint trip to Disneyland," Irina Matveeva concludes.
As for the responders to the original post, most of them fully sided with our heroine, arguing that it was just her mother's attempt to impose her own opinions and priorities on her, nothing more. "Keep the tickets and swap them when it's the right time for you," one of the commenters wrote. "Don't let her force your hand - play the game by your rules." So, how do you, our dear readers, view this game plan for the author?
The commenters' general opinion was that the author should decide for herself and maybe swap the tickets for the appropriate time for her and her family
