Who doesn’t love a little dinner date with friends, especially when there’s chocolate cake involved? Whelp… There seem to be certain times where, regardless of the host’s attempts at making everyone happy, it is not to be. However, the situation can become much worse with attitude and entitlement coming from the guests.
Such a situation was recently described by one Reddit user who wanted a different perspective on what had occurred during a dinner party she hosted for their friends and their 9-year-old child. Lots of tears and hard feelings put a damper on the lovely evening, and the host couldn’t help but wonder—were they in the wrong here? Let’s find out.
Dinner parties are a great way to catch up with loved ones; however, no one can predict just how wrong they can go
Image credits: DragonImages (not the actual photo)
One person shared her own dinnertime nightmare when a guest’s child started crying over what seemed to be chocolate cake
Image credits: Kampus Production (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Wavebreakmedia (not the actual photo)
Image credits: ImSoSorryCharlie
The issues with the food seemed to have come out of the blue, as the mom herself assured that no one had any food preferences or intolerances
Image credits: Louis Hansel (not the actual photo)
It seems from the story and the updates provided that the host did all they could to cater to both the adults and the child in the equation. The mom herself stated that “there was nothing [she] needed to worry about,” and yet the situation that unfolded made it to be anything but. What could have been a lovely evening turned into a nightmare, all thanks to miscommunication.
As stated in the update, the family had gone through a difficult time with admitting grandma into hospital. And as much of an annoyance it would have been to cancel the plans last minute, it may have been the better thing to do. Otherwise, speaking to the host about what had happened may have put them all on the same page, instead of emotions erupting left and right.
However, what led to the guests being asked to leave was the mom’s entitled reaction and demands for an apology and a newly-cooked meal
Image credits: Timur Weber (not the actual photo)
Regardless of it all, one should remember that self-accountability—taking responsibility for your actions and behaviors without blaming others—is key. With the mom, it was uncalled for to make the host feel guilty for her child’s tears. With or without extenuating circumstances, a child’s behavior is the parent’s responsibility.
Making mistakes is a part of daily life, and when situations like this happen, the best thing we can do is to calmly look at everything that happened, not excluding ourselves as being at fault. Admitting to the mistake, reflecting on what happened, and figuring out how to make it up to the people that may have been hurt in the process is key to mending friendships and other relationships alike.
However, there are certain things that guests should never do when it comes to dinner parties, as they can be seen as incredibly rude. Jessica Ball, a registered dietitian, argues that allowing the host to provide all of the food and drinks, keeping quiet about food allergies or intolerances, and asking for something that’s not on the table are just some of the things that should never occur. At least 2 of the 3 are present in the situation we’re discussing.
What should have been a lovely evening ended with tears, hurt feelings and the host wondering whether they were in the wrong
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)
As a dinner host, one must always be prepared for things to go wrong, especially when it comes to unagreeable guests getting on one’s last nerve. Etiquette expert Julie Blais Comeau has some advice for all of us that may help us deal with such situations in the best way possible. The main thing—don’t take anything personally.
Maybe the guest is simply having a bad day, as the people in this story were, or maybe they had an argument with a loved one, etc. Ignoring the guest’s mood may be one solution. If the circumstance allows, taking them back and discussing it discreetly may solve the problem. The least confrontational, the better, especially since a host should never snap back at a guest.
The internet, however, sided with the host on the matter, deeming them not to be the jerk
