Every woman who ever wished to get married dreams of her perfect wedding dress. Planning a wedding and making key decisions pretty much revolve around the look and aesthetic of the wedding gown.
Weddings themselves can spread chaos all over the place, and history is filled with such disasters. Although we can guess how Henry VIII would look like today, we’re sure his marriage to Anne Boleyn would still be heavily influenced by family pressures and drama. In the narrator's case, she never expected that her own mother and sister would get in the way of her planning and coordination.
More info: Reddit
Planning a wedding means accepting that drama will attend uninvited, but sometimes it goes straight for the most important thing on the list
Image credits: user15285612 / Magnific (not the actual photo)
One bride waited weeks for her wedding dress to arrive after COVID delays, only for it to vanish right when she was meant to pick it up
Suspecting the gown was stolen, she burst into tears as her fiance tried to figure out with the shipping company what had happened, and eventually went to the cameras
Image credits: dikushin / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Turns out, the mother stole the dress and tried to justify it by saying she just wanted to check if the gown was ok after waiting for so long
Image credits: bokodi / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Image credits: BlueWhiteTrees
For the bride, this was the final straw, and she was considering going no contact with her mother, even if she offered an explanation for her actions
I got married myself during the lockdown, just as many of us here, and I can tell you that wedding planning involved quite a bit of waiting and patience. And for this bride, the situation was pretty similar. Every step of organizing a wedding required extra attention, and the OP was working with both the bridal shop and the shipping company to finally receive her wedding gown.
Wedding planning can push you to the verge of tears when something seems to be going wrong. Wedding planner expert Claire Clarke warns about the underlying stress and says that support from your loved ones is probably the best remedy. If you lack this support, things can get out of hand pretty quickly.
At first, the bride’s mom had her concerns, but the narrator had taken care of everything, waiting for her gown with high expectations. However, when looking for her dress, it was nowhere to be found. Amongst tears, she and her fiancé complained to the shipping department, and when going to the cameras, they found the culprit: her mom and her sister.
When confronted, the mom did try to justify herself, going so far as to pretend she had no idea what her daughter was talking about. Not that we are diagnosing anyone here, we'll leave that to the pros. But, according to experts, showing fake signs of vulnerability is a core trait in a narcissistic mom. “Narcissistic mothers do not take responsibility for their own wrongdoings”, explains mental health writer Anna Drescher.
Image credits: jet-po / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Even after impersonating her daughter, intercepting the dress, and lying straight to her face, the mom still tried to justify her actions. She claimed she only wanted to inspect it after waiting so long for it to arrive. But this so-called inspection could have easily been done by the actual owner of the dress. As the OP herself pointed out, her relatives had no right to go behind her back and then act as if they were in the right.
So, the bride decided to go no contact with her family, which is probably the best decision, since her mom seems to have some narcissistic traits. As Kristy Lee Parkin states, “a narcissist is only as powerful as the permission given to them to hurt someone. Creating boundaries, limiting communication, and finding alternate outlets of love and acceptance are just a few ways to protect one’s heart and wellbeing.”
Which is why doing the ice treatment is a good solution, especially during the stressful phase of a wedding. The narrator explained she didn't want to lose contact with her father, who has always been truthful to her and would not lie for the sake of his wife. The OP's mom showed signs of wanting to patch things up, and communication is important during these special moments in life.
However, the community prompted the bride to even uninvited the mother and sister from the ceremony, and even though it may seem a little bit extreme, it seems like a smart decision here. For people around social media, it’s clear that they crossed a line.
But don’t let us be the only judges of the situation, what would you have done? Can you share your own wedding planning disasters with us?
The community overflowed with comments supporting the bride and warned her about her mother and sister’s sneaky behavior
