In a 2018 Times opinion essay 'The Boys Are Not All Right,' American actor, comedian, and writer Michael Ian Black wrote: "The past 50 years have redefined what it means to be female in America. Girls today are told that they can do anything, be anyone. They've absorbed the message: They're outperforming boys in school at every level. But it isn't just about performance. To be a girl today is to be the beneficiary of decades of conversation about the complexities of womanhood, its many forms and expressions."
"Boys, though, have been left behind. No commensurate movement has emerged to help them navigate toward a full expression of their gender. It's no longer enough to 'be a man' — we no longer even know what that means."
Also, surveys from around the world find that males everywhere are reluctant to talk about their mental health and are far more likely to die by suicide than females.
Interested in the everyday implications of this, Reddit user Workdncsheets posted a question on the platform, asking "What are some things that are normal to men but mind-blowing to women?" and it immediately went viral. Here are some of the most popular replies among the 2.8K comments they've received.
#1
I'm 39. I started down an entirely new career path in mid-January. I've had horrible imposter syndrome since day 1 but the new job feels good. My boss (who happens to be a woman) sent me the nicest most complimentary email thanking me for being such a good addition to the team and I sincerely cried because in all my years in the workforce nobody has ever appreciated me so much. I imagine to her it was just one of those things a good boss does - "hey, my employee did a good job, I should tell them!" I sent it to my dad when he asked me how the new job was going. Even HE cried out of pride. Men don't get compliments, and when we do, we really feel it.
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180points
#2
Two guy friends could spend the afternoon together, have a grand time, come home, and have their respective wives be absolutely bewildered that they didn’t learn anything about what’s going on in the other guy's life.
144points
#3
The first time my wife showered with me she stops and says “it’s moving! Are you doing that? Why is it moving?” That was when I realized, if you don’t have a dong, you don’t know that they can move around as your testicles move, nor do you know that testicles move around all the time on their own. Particularly in an environment where the temperature is getting either hot or cold, like a shower. Balls move and balls itch. It’s what they do. And d***s have a mind of their own. Don’t ask me why it’s hard, I’ve been asking it that since I hit puberty.
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118points
#4
Had a meetup with the boys for hours. not a single photo was taken.
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117points
#5
Being single means no physical contact for extended periods. Or just me. I haven't been hugged in over 4 years. The last time I touched someone else was a handshake 5 months ago.
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100points
#7
My wife continually asks me 'did anyone say anything about your shirt/hair/shoes/etc?'
No, no one says anything about my appearance.
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92points
#8
As a woman I can say something that blows my mind constantly about men is being able to leave the house with no bag. Just like keys and wallet in pockets. 0 inventory. Wild to me.
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92points
#9
From what I am constantly told - the size of our standard pants pockets is mind-blowing.
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91points
#10
Long car rides with another dude, nobody says anything and nobody is mad.
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90points
#11
Men just naturally have a level of strength that surprises women. Testosterone is a hell of a d**g.
For example: my wife has been going to the gym for a while now. She's noticeably stronger now and it's awesome for her. I actually commented and complimented it the other night. But me, a dumpy 45 year old man whose exercise is walking and carrying groceries, I'm still stronger than her just because I'm a guy.
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88points
#12
Erection =\= Aroused.
It boggles their mind that just cause a guy gets hard doesn’t mean he is ready to go. Sometimes it just…happens.
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87points
#13
My friends who I haven't seen in YEARS went camping with me recently for four days. I got back and my wife asked me what's been going on in their lives. I pondered and said that I don't really know beyond some got married at some point, one had a kid but I don't know when, and that we mainly talked random stuff. One night we had ended up making a tier list of dipping sauces over three hours.
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85points
#14
In general (the men I know), discussing a partners body or intimate relationship details would be crossing a line and is at best weird, and at worst a betrayal.
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80points
#15
Having to suppress emotional responses, anxiety, depression otherwise being considered a loser, weak and worthless.
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75points
#16
We clean off s**t stuck to the inside of the toilet bowl when we p**s. It ain’t much but it’s honest work.
68points
#17
I don't remember the birthday of my best friend of 12 years. i just know its in January.
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66points
#18
The expectation to help in certain situations, especially as a big guy.
I went to retirement party for a person I never met before (invited by a friend). Literally minutes after I showed up, some random lady came up to me and *told* me to come with her because she needed something carried somewhere.
After I helped the woman above, I remember my (female) friend was kinda surprised that this woman just demanded I help her, without knowing who I was at all. I don't mind helping. On some level it's nice (?) knowing that I look strong enough to help people do things they physically can't. But this happens ALL. THE. TIME. Which also surprised her.
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63points
#19
That we don’t socialize/talk/bond with other guys in the bathroom.
No talking in the bathroom. You go in, take care of business, wash your hands, and get out.
No standing next to another dude at the urinal unless you have no choice.
Women’s behavior in the bathroom is considerably different than men’s behavior, or so I’ve been told.
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62points
#20
My female friends don’t roast each other like I do with my friends. It’s all in good fun, but I can’t joke with them like I do with my male friends.
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60points