Choosing a name for a kid is a big responsibility as well as one of the most important decisions. The kid will have the same name (in most cases) for their whole life. Moreover, some parents know from the very beginning how they want to name their baby, others put a lot of work into this decision, but others can decide the second they first see the baby - somehow the name just ‘clicks’.
It’s important to avoid names that have weird meanings or associations. I believe you can imagine - if you know somebody who is, let’s say, not your favorite person, probably that person’s name won’t be on the list for your future baby no matter how nice the name is, as the association and thought of that person doesn’t look too appealing.
More info: Reddit
It would be a slightly weird family dynamic having a cat and a little baby with the same name
Image credits: jamie mklose kangarat (not the actual photo)
Woman asks community members if she was wrong for not changing her cat’s name despite her pregnant cousin’s request
Image credits: RiverRiden
Image credits: Chad Kittel (not the actual photo)
Her cousin claimed it was her ‘dream name’ for her daughter
Image credits: RiverRiden
The OP ended up being called selfish for valuing a ‘stupid cat’ over cousin’s baby
A few days ago, one Reddit user took her story to one of the most judgmental communities asking if she was wrong for refusing to change her cat’s name as her pregnant cousin requested so that she can use it for her baby. The post collected almost 9K upvotes and more than 2.5K comments.
The author of this story recently adopted a cat, whose name is Millie. She was given this name in the shelter, it suited her, and she responded to it, thus the OP didn’t rename her new family member. Moreover, OP’s pregnant cousin posted a list of the potential baby names on social media, to which the author commented that her cat’s name is on the list.
Later on she received a message with a request to rename her cat because she wants to use this name for her daughter. The OP refused as the cat was named first but didn’t mind if the cousin's baby shared the same name with her cat. However, if there was a problem, she could choose from plenty of other names. Well, the author ended up being called selfish because she values a ‘stupid cat’ over her cousin’s baby.
The community members gave the author the ‘Not the A-hole’ badge and assured her that she is not obligated to change her cat’s name. “DON'T change your cat's name. There are thousands of people and animals who share names,” one user wrote. Another added: “Two beings can have the same name and the universe will not implode. Keep your cat's name!”
Image credits: Arina Krasnikova (not the actual photo)
Bored Panda contacted Amber, who is better known as ‘The Name Fairy’ and she kindly agreed to share her insights regarding this situation and in general situations when the names of a pet and baby are matching!
“My philosophy when it comes to situations like this is whatever person or animal was named first, that name is then permanent!” Amber started. “ I don't think it's fair for her to ask her cousin to change her cat's name just so she can use the name for her daughter. The name is already being used in the family, and if she really, really wants to use the name, then she should just use it! It's not even a super close relative like her sister's cat, for example, so it seems fine to me.”
Additionally, even the woman agrees to change the same, Amber mentioned that the association first of all, will be with the cat! “So the cat might as well keep the name and the cousin can just ALSO use the name. It will be associated with it no matter what, so she should just embrace it if she feels so strongly about using the name,” she emphasized.
Now, Amber also shared that she has had clients in a similar situation like the story. “I feel like most people respect that the name is already used, and even though they're bummed about it, they don't ask their family member/friend to change their pet's name. When this happens, most clients ask me to recommend similar names to the one that they like, and I think that's a great solution to the problem!”
Speaking about solutions in this situation: “I think that the woman who's being asked to change her cat's name should respectfully offer up some different solutions for her cousin,” Amber started. “Or, she could recommend my services to her and I could help her by coming up with similar names that could work as alternatives! [smiley face] She could also just tell her that using a similar name is a potential solution to this problem.”
Image credits: John Gillespie (not the actual photo)
Moreover, Bored Panda got into contact with Taylor A. Humphrey, who is the founder of “What’s in a Baby’s Name”. She was kind enough to share her thoughts on this situation!
“I certainly understand the gravity of the topic,” she started. “Name stealing is a significant issue that can lead to emotional distress and strained relationships between the parties involved. (Please see my TikTok videos on this topic, for more.) It's crucial to approach such gray areas with discernment and nuance, considering the emotional labor involved and the potential rupture of trust in this relationship.”
“There's that great poem by TS Eliot 'The Naming of Cats' which explains that cats have 3 names: a group name, a house name, and a personal name which may never be divulged,” she emphasized. “I think it's unfair to ask the cat owner to change her cat's name, and it overlooks the very important fact that many pet names morph over time. Ask any pet owner what they call their pets in the privacy of their own homes, and they will bashfully regurgitate the most unhinged utterances you've ever heard.”
Additionally, she shared her personal story to support the thought: “For example, my dog, Willoughby, mostly goes by 'Willa,' but occasionally when my dog-voice gets out of hand, she'll also respond to more outrageous names like ‘Cucina Bootsy Boots’, ‘Mr. Baby Cutes’ and ‘Little Smelly Muffin Girl’. So there's a futility and pointlessness in asking a pet owner to change their pet's name on the behalf of a human child, because a pet is rarely called by their one given name,” Taylor mentioned.
And finally, a few recommendations: “In this situation, open and honest communication between the cat owner and the cousin is essential, allowing each party to express their feelings and concerns. In my professional opinion, it's purr-fectly acceptable to choose the same given name for one's child, without the rigamarole of asking to change the cat's name. While dogs are social creatures that may ultimately have more interaction with the greater family unit, cats are territorial homebodies that don't have as much exposure to extended family. I hardly think that between a human baby and a cousin's cat, family members would first think of the cat that they've likely never met.”
People backed the author up, shared some jokes and personal stories regarding this situation
