Being a parent is no walk in the park; it requires a lot of effort, patience, and care. A mom or dad’s main role is to keep their kid safe, healthy, and happy. Even if they sometimes falter in these tasks, good parents always correct their mistakes.
Unfortunately, this woman realized that her partner wasn’t a very good dad after his foolishness almost cost their toddler his life. On top of that, the man didn’t want to admit to his mistakes and instead blamed the poster for his carelessness.
More info: Mumsnet
Partners need to be able to trust each other, especially when it comes to parenting, or else it’s the child who will suffer in the end
Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The woman shared that she and her partner had been in a relationship for five years and had a two-year-old son together
Image credits: kcu3191 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
One time, the poster asked her partner to watch their kid for a few minutes, but by the time she returned from her task, the kid had run away while his dad was on his phone
Image credits: namii9 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The same thing happened a second time when the toddler escaped and almost got hit by a car, all because his dad was engrossed in his phone
Image credits: PinkPeer
Even though it was the dad’s fault that the kid had been in danger under his watch, he put all the blame on his partner
The woman had trusted her partner to look after their toddler, and he had let her down both times. He also did not take any responsibility for his actions despite paying more attention to his phone than his toddler. His lack of remorse and stubbornness scared the poster because she didn’t want her child to get injured because of the man’s actions.
It’s important to set strong boundaries when dealing with a partner who is negligent. To understand how to do that, Bored Panda reached out to Prerna Sinha. She is an award-winning blogger, the founder of MaaOfAllBlogs, and co-founder of the I.N.S.P.I.R.E awards that celebrate and recognize the efforts of mothers. Prerna is also a fitness influencer, travel enthusiast, and yoga teacher.
Prerna said: “As parents, when you bring a child into this world, you are equally responsible for its well-being. The safety of a child is a basic requirement, and you can’t be careless about it. You need to sit down, communicate, and set expectations on how the child's safety has to be managed. A parent should know their duty.”
“The partner may also need some counseling if he is not able to understand this. Finally, both partners need to build trust among themselves, and this needs commitment,” she added. Even though the OP might have wanted to work on the situation, it didn’t seem like her partner thought there was any issue to be resolved.
When netizens asked why the man didn’t seem to be taking responsibility for his actions, the poster told them that her partner was very “old-fashioned.” He believes in traditional roles where the man is the breadwinner and the woman takes care of the kids. That’s probably why he seemed so disinterested in the child’s well-being.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Another concerning thing that the woman realized was that her partner seemed to lose all sense of what was happening around him whenever he was on his phone. Unfortunately, this is becoming more common among parents and can distract them from spending time with their kids or paying attention to their needs.
Prerna told us that “being online can be addictive as it generates dopamine. Sometimes parents and kids lose track of things around them. I have noticed even when I am working non-stop using the screen, I also tend to zone out, but it’s no excuse to not be aware of your kids or what they are doing.”
“One solution is to baby-proof the house. Secondly, the partners can agree that if one needs to step out, the other will not be online while babysitting. Especially if they tend to zone out in front of the screen,” she explained.
Netizens were extremely concerned for the woman and her child’s safety. They felt that the man’s negligence could lead to some serious consequences. The OP cleared things up by telling folks that she had been planning to leave for a while but first had to get her affairs in order.
Prerna also suggested that until then, it’s best not to entirely rely on the man and to “set up a backup support system, like daycare, grandparents, friends, hire a nanny, etc. If you don’t have one or can’t afford one, then set up checkpoints to see if the doors are locked and the baby safety guard is in place.”
Nobody wants to be with an incompetent partner whom they can never rely on, especially if there’s a child involved. Hopefully, the woman can eventually leave him, and who knows, he might not even realize she’s gone, especially if he’s on his phone!
Folks were shocked by the man’s utter incompetence and urged the woman to leave him
