Everything in this life has to be paid for - that's how our world works, whether we like it or not. Well, almost everything - there's a special category of family feelings that doesn't have to be supported by a monetary component. Although many examples from life only emphasize that very few people can be seriously trusted. Especially when it comes to money.
For example, the user u/Difficult-Pilot-7721, the author of today's story, who recently faced a difficult problem of both a financial and an ethical nature - whether to continue paying the mortgage for his parents or not - even though they violated their long-standing verbal agreement. So, let's read on.
More info: Reddit
The author of the post had been paying his parents' mortgage and property taxes for 8 years out of gratitude for giving him and his sister an excellent education
Image credits: Pixabay / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The man also had a verbal agreement with his parents that he would receive their house after they passed away one day
Image credits: Difficult-Pilot-7721
Image credits: Tima Miroshnichenko / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Recently, the author's sister lost her job and moved in with her parents while searching for a new one
Image credits: Difficult-Pilot-7721
Image credits: SkelDry / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman finally decided to stay in this house, which made the author mad as he understood that his agreement with his parents was actually broken
Image credits: Difficult-Pilot-7721
The man decided to stop paying the mortgage from then on - since his sister had taken over the house
The Original poster (OP) says that he is 32 years old, his younger sister is 29, and thanks to their parents, they received an excellent education at top universities and subsequently both found successful jobs. However, all this had a downside - their parents spent nearly all of their savings on their children's education, and after retirement, they didn't have much money left.
So, our hero considered it his moral duty to pay the mortgage and property taxes for his parents for the past eight years. It sounds very noble - although, of course, our hero had his own mercantile considerations. The parents promised that later, the house would become his property, and he would receive more than a return on his investment after the sale.
But recently, the OP's sister lost her job, and while she was in the process of finding a new one, her parents invited her to live with them—and she agreed. Moreover, later, she even agreed that she would now live there. Our hero was not happy with this - least of all because he understood that his sister wouldn't sell the house later - and this meant that all the money that he'd been contributing for years would go to waste.
So the author said that he would stop paying the mortgage and, since his sister was taking over the house, she should pay for everything. The parents and his sister suggested that she pay him his share later - but our hero believes that he has already been burned once through verbal agreements and doesn't want to get burned again. So the man wonders - is he doing the right thing here?
Image credits: Mikhail Nilov / Pexels (not the actual photo)
It must be said that this story actually has two aspects - business and moral. And if, from a business point of view, there are no questions about the original poster's decision (more precisely, there are - why has he been contributing for so long under just a verbal agreement?), then from a moral point of view, the situation may seem at least controversial.
"Parents often act in exactly this way - they try to help more the one of their children who, in fact or in their feelings, needs their help more," says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist with whom Bored Panda got in touch for a comment here. "And this actually doesn't actually depend on the age of the children."
"It is not surprising that in this situation the parents considered it necessary to provide maximum support to their daughter - even at the cost of breaking their unwritten agreement with their son. So this man's fears that a word broken once could be broken a second time are quite real.
"In any case, this once again confirms the truth - you should always record all possible agreements, even between close relatives, on paper. Verbal agreements are great and commendable, but not in our turbulent world," Irina concludes.
People in the comments mostly supported our hero in his decision, urging him not to give in to the probable persuasion of his parents and his sister, and to stop all payments there and then. "It’s not on you to be financially responsible for 3 adults and get absolutely 0 benefit," one of the responders wrote reasonably. And do you, our dear readers, also agree with these conclusions?
Most commenters sided with the author, even urging him not to give in to his parents and sister's coaxes to continue paying
