Your parents are supposed to have your back whether you’re still living with them or already moved out. If you landed a fresh new job and started saving up for college, they ought to be proud of you. Unfortunately, that’s not quite what happened to one teenager.
Seventeen-year-old redditor u/JonKingStone turned to the internet for advice after his parents laid claim to his savings that he kept hidden at home. They demanded that he pay rent and the family drama created a large rift between all of them. You’ll find the full story and the solid advice other internet users gave the OP below. Bored Panda has reached out to u/JonKingStone and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from him.
Many parents would be proud that their child found a job and is finally earning money. Some, however, start to behave selfishly
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual image)
A teenager turned to the net for advice after his parents found the savings he had hidden in his room
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual image)
Image credits: JonKingStone
The parents seemed to be more interested in the teen's money than teaching him about financial responsibility
The irony is that the teenager was so happy having gotten the job that he was willing to contribute at home in other ways. “I told my parents about it and offered to cover some expenses like groceries since I wanted to help them out,” he said.
Instead, the Reddit user opened up about how his mom got hold of the money he’d hidden in his room. She demanded that he use half of it to pay rent while he’s living at their home. Later, according to the OP, she talked to his dad and they decided they wanted all of the money.
“They said I was a stubborn son and they wanted all of it. They said if I didn’t agree, I could leave. So I left,” u/JonKingStone said that he moved in with his uncle, who had given him his job in the first place.
Fortunately, many other redditors had some great pieces of advice for the teenager. They pointed out that he did nothing wrong and were appalled by how selfishly his parents behaved.
As one Reddit user pointed out, the problem isn’t the fact that the parents asked for rent once their child started earning money. The issue is the amount they ask for and the general attitude, as though his hard-earned cash doesn’t even belong to him.
“Just snatching an arbitrary amount is theft and nothing else,” one redditor wrote, urging the teenager to get his own bank account ASAP, as well as a lockbox.
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual image)
There are both upsides and downsides when asking your kid to pay rent
Broadly speaking, it’s a good idea to teach one’s kids how to be financially responsible. That includes teaching them the value of money, why saving is important, and how investing works.
Another important lesson is that family members contribute to the household in whatever way that they can, depending on their time and resources. However, it’s up to each family to determine how they teach these lessons and what aspects they focus on the most.
Asking your child to pay rent and utilities can get them ready for life as an adult. However, the amount they contribute should be based on how much they’re earning at their job. The odds are that they won’t be bringing the same amount of cash each month as their parents.
Even a symbolic amount can help with the costs at home, but you don’t want them to resent you for taking away their meager savings if they’re earning barely anything. Whatever you decide to do as a parent, it’s important to communicate very clearly about this issue. You need to set expectations about the amount they contribute, when they have to pay, and what happens if they miss a payment.
Obviously, if your kid isn’t working, then asking them to dip into their savings to pay rent doesn’t make much sense.
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual image)
Children can contribute in other ways while living at their parents' home
They could, however, help out in other ways. For instance, they could help out with the housework, including washing the dishes, doing the grocery shopping, cooking, taking out the trash, vacuuming, and anything else that needs doing.
So long as they’re genuinely contributing to the family, this could be considered an alternative to rent. However, at the same time, the child should not be responsible for all the chores at home—they’re not a servant. What you want to avoid is your child thinking that they’re being taken advantage of.
Additionally, ‘Parents Plus Kids’ notes that children under the age of 18 should not be expected to pay rent. Until they’re adults legally, they should have a place to stay without the pressure of paying for a roof over their heads.
Otherwise, you risk the relationship between parent and child turning into a purely transactional one between a landlord and tenant. At the end of the day, however, teens paying rent is a very individual decision that will depend on each family’s unique situation. Whatever the case might be, though, no parent should try to take away their child’s hard-earned savings against their will.
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual image)
Some friendly internet users had some practical advice for the teen
