Movies and shows love depicting perfectionists as quirky people who always want things done right and are generally fun to be around. In reality, folks might find it tough to be close to someone who is such a stickler for rules and organization.
That’s what one man kept facing at work because of his pregnant sister-in-law’s obsessive perfectionism and her constant criticism. Unfortunately, when he finally reached his breaking point, he snapped and said she would be a parenting failure if she behaved the same with her kid.
More info: Reddit
Even though most people do their best to get along with different personality types, it can be difficult if there is constant friction between them
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The poster explained that he had been working in the same organization as his sister-in-law and that since she was a “Type A” personality, she was always nitpicky
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One day, when the man had to prepare a guest room for the company’s CEO, the woman kept criticizing his work and pointed out many mistakes he had made
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Eventually, the man got frustrated and told the woman that if she didn’t keep a handle on her perfectionism, she would mess up her future baby’s life
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The pregnant woman felt quite hurt by her brother-in-law’s insult and started crying, which led to him being painted as the bad guy in front of everyone
The poster explained that he and his sister-in-law had been working together for a long time and that he had learned she was quite a perfectionist. This behavior served her well in the hospitality industry, but it also annoyed others because she was always quite critical of any of the work that they did.
According to mental health professionals, people who are so focused on everything being perfect might struggle to feel content or satisfied with things in their day-to-day lives. When this behavior only affects them, others might not notice as much, but if it spills over into the rest of their lives, it can begin to affect their relationships, too.
This is exactly what happened between the OP and his in-law, because she would always find fault with his work. Things got even more heated when he was preparing a room for their company’s CEO, and she could only point out flaws with his work. Even though he tried his best to brush off her criticism, she kept on insulting him.
Although most people might try to be empathetic toward obsessive perfectionists like these, experts explain that it is often better to set boundaries with them. This is because their compulsive behavior can also take its toll on you, so distancing yourself or confronting them can help protect your mental peace.
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The poster tried his best not to react to his sister-in-law’s words because he knew she was quite a strong “Type A” personality and also pregnant. Unfortunately, after a while, he just couldn’t take it anymore and told her that if she kept being so obsessive, she would ruin her baby’s life.
He told her that if she kept being so controlling and such a perfectionist, her future child would grow up in an environment where they would always feel inadequate. According to him, this could lead to emotional trauma that could have a very big negative impact on the little one’s life later on.
It can be very difficult to hear someone criticize your parenting, which is why professionals advise against taking such words too seriously. Although you might have a strong emotional reaction to such criticism, later on, when your feelings have settled, you can figure out if there actually is something you should implement or change in what you’re doing.
Since the sister-in-law had only recently become pregnant and was quite an obsessive perfectionist, the poster’s words must have hit her even harder. That’s why she began crying and accused him of not understanding her point of view at all. Even though he knew that he had caused her pain, the man still didn’t feel that he had done anything wrong.
Do you think the guy did the right thing by confronting his sister-in-law like that? We’d love to hear your opinions on this and whether you’ve ever encountered a perfectionist.
Most people felt that the poster had crossed a line by insulting his pregnant in-law, but they also understood how her behavior could be frustrating for people
