You can prepare for many things in parenthood: you can take classes to learn how to properly hold a baby or what diet is the best for a kid, you can read up on child psychology to find out how their brain works and what your response to their behavior should be.
But it’s impossible to prepare for everything, especially when it comes to medical emergencies. You may have a fear of blood or get weak if you see a broken bone. Doesn’t help that you are scared to death for your child.
This dad on Reddit saw his daughter break her arm and his initial reaction was terror, which is understandable, but then his body reacted in an unexpected way and that prevented him from immediately taking care of his daughter. His wife was not impressed and now the man doubts his skills of being a father.
More info: Reddit
Dad saw a broken arm for the first time and he couldn't help his daughter immediately as his stomach was not cooperating
Image credits: Mr Seb (not the actual photo)
The Original Poster (OP) has a family that includes his wife, their 10-year-old daughter Carol and their 7-year-old girl Jane. Recently the dad went with his daughters to the playground and in the meantime, his wife was shopping.
The two sisters got in an argument and the little one, Jane, was running to her dad to complain about it. She had her eyes closed so the girl didn’t see where she was going and tripped hard, breaking her arm as she didn’t put it out in time.
Due to the adrenaline rush and the confusion, Jane didn’t understand what was happening and just went silent and pale. When his daughter got up, the dad realized that Jane had broken her arm as it did not look right.
The sight of the arm snapped in half was shocking as the dad had never seen anything like this, so he needed a second to collect himself and check if this was actually happening. But he felt that he needed more than a second and turned to a bush to empty his stomach.
The OP went to a playground with his 7-year-old daughter Jane and his 10-year-old daughter Carol
Image credits: Time_Policy9325
Jane started crying and Carol came to comfort her, so the dad got it together and took his injured daughter to the hospital. The OP didn't look at Jane as he didn’t want to see the arm, which could cause another reaction, as he needed to drive his child safely to an emergency room.
Turns out, it was a simple case of a kid breaking a bone and the family headed home 3 hours later. But Carol couldn’t forget how her dad reacted to a situation that is not that rare for parents to deal with and when OP’s wife found out about it, she wasn’t holding back.
The wife called her husband selfish, pathetic and a bad dad. Replying to the comments, the OP said that he was taken aback by his wife’s words because she doesn’t usually speak to him like that. As it turned out, the wife was just scared and felt guilty that she wasn’t there herself and couldn’t help her daughter.
The wife assured the OP that he is a great dad and spoke those mean words out of irritation and being overwhelmed. She apologized and the OP understood where his wife was coming from because their kids had never had anything serious happen to them so when it did, none of them were prepared to handle it calmly.
After an argument with her older sister, Jane was running to her dad and fell on the concrete, which resulted in her breaking her arm
Image credits: Time_Policy9325
It seems that the family is doing great now as the parents talked it out and the girls are back to their happy selves. The OP added in the comments that he talked with his daughters, praised them for being so brave, and apologized for not being the adult they hoped for in such a situation.
People in the comments not only told the OP that he wasn’t a jerk in this situation, but that nobody deserves that title in this case as the dad couldn't control his physiological reaction and the mom was just worried because she would expect him to be there for their children no matter what.
Also, he did eventually snap out of it and got his emotions in check. He was a responsible parent and drove his daughter to a hospital, tried to calm her down and made sure he didn’t cause another vomit attack or fainting. In addition to that, he talked about it with the girls and promised to do better next time.
At first the dad was in disbelief and when he realized this was really happening, his body's reaction was to throw up
Image credits: Time_Policy9325
As a parent, you must do better next time because your children rely on you and this experience should make the dad more prepared the next time. But sometimes your body does react in a strange way despite the fact that you really want to help.
Children don’t break their bones every day, but it happens; they also fall and cut themselves. You may get scared and overwhelmed because you know your child is in pain or you legitimately have a fear of blood and just can't put on a bandage without fainting.
Eventually he took Jane to the hospital, but when Carol told her mom what happened in the playground, she was furious
Image credits: Time_Policy9325
If panic is your problem, Mommy Base reminds you that it doesn’t help and may prevent you giving your child the best care they need. They explain that when your child gets hurt, you need to be calm firstly for yourself because you need to turn on the logical thinking. And even if you feel panicked inside, you shouldn’t allow it to escape.
Some things that may help with calming down are to “Remember to breathe, long and slow deep breaths in a stressful situation will help. Refresh your perspective and remind yourself that kids are kids, scraped knees and bumps and bruises will happen with or without your panic. Lastly? Anticipate these things. Be ready for trips and falls and little accidents by keeping a prepared emergency kit near by.”
You should also keep calm for your child as they are not as skilled at managing their emotions and will turn to you for reassurance and consolation. They expect from you to know what to do and take control of the situation because it is the parent’s duty.
The wife went as far as calling the OP a bad dad because he didn't support his daughter when she had just gotten hurt badly
Image credits: Time_Policy9325
If a phobia is what prevents you from taking care of your child in an emergency, it is important to work through it. According to the NHS, you can get rid of most phobias: “Simple phobias can be treated through gradual exposure to the object, animal, place or situation that causes fear and anxiety. This is known as desensitisation or self-exposure therapy.”
If a phobia is more complex and stronger, it can take longer to cure it and may involve counseling, psychotherapy, cognitive behavioral therapy or even the use of medicine.
Throwing up is a bit tricky to control, so it's understandable why the dad felt bad as he didn't know how he could have handled the situation better
Image credits: Time_Policy9325
In the end the wife apologized for her words as she was overwhelmed and took all her stress and anxiety out on her husband
Image credits: abhishek goel (not the actual photo)
Raising a child puts you in a variety of very difficult and uncomfortable situations. It could be that you relate to OP and would also have a severe reaction to seeing a broken arm. It could be that you are not a confrontational person naturally, but you need to stand up for your child at school. Or you have social anxiety and parenting conferences freak you out.
However, being a parent requires taking responsibility for the person you brought into this world, so trying to work through your own issues is essential if you want to bring up a healthy and happy human being.
What do you think of this story? Was the dad at fault here? Do you think he could have done anything differently? Let us know your thoughts in the comments!
People in the comments weren't as harsh to the dad and praised him for being a responsible parent in the end
