Most of us have something we can't wait to have happen. It can vary from a career or life change to waiting for a certain event, like a celebration of an occasion or concert.
Today's OP was one of these people. She couldn't wait to attend a concert, Taylor Swift's The Eras Tour, to be more specific. Then, her sister-in-law's mom died and she expected the original poster to support her nearly 24/7. So, when the woman said she was still attending the concert, the SIL almost exploded in anger.
More info: Reddit
Grief is a complicated matter that not only confuses the person themselves but can strain their relationships too
Image credits: Pablo Merchán Montes / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
For over a year, a woman had been preparing to attend The Eras Tour – making bracelets, picking out her outfit, and so on
Image credits: Fellipe Ditadi / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Then, days before the concert date, her sister-in-law lost her mother, which led to her needing a lot of help during such a hard time
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The woman helped her brother's wife however she could but didn't cancel the concert trip, which angered the sister-in-law when she learned about it
Image credits: Lower-Let9945
The sister-in-law expressed that she hoped everyone would abandon the woman after her mother died, just like she did to her
The OP has a sister-in-law Grace, whose mom recently died. So, the original poster went over to her place to help – she did laundry, made dinner, and prepped wraps and casseroles for later. With all of that, she stayed there until 2 AM.
The next morning, she received a call from her sister-in-law asking her to come over again, but the author refused to do so. She had stuff planned to do before she left for Taylor Swift’s The Eras Tour concert in Indianapolis, the last stop of the tour in the United States.
This explanation confused Grace. She asked whether the OP was actually still going to the concert and received a confirmation. Then, she got mad. She couldn’t believe that the author would even consider going to the concert when, in her words, she had just become an orphan.
Naturally, the original poster felt sorry and promised to spend time with her SIL right after she got back. But she couldn’t skip the concert – she bought the tickets over a year ago and getting them was no easy thing.
Ticketmaster, which was selling the tickets to these shows in the US, messed up so badly with the sales that some fans ended up suing them. They claimed that the platform kept kicking them out of the queue, which furthered them from a chance to get reasonably priced tickets. One fan said that it happened 41 times for them. Then, when they were finally able to get to the queue’s end, the tickets cost something like $1,400.
And that’s just one fan’s experience. Plus, the queue problem wasn’t the only one – overall, Ticketmaster was accused of intentional deception, price fixing, fraud, and antitrust.
Getting the ticket wasn’t the only preparation the OP did. She also prepared a specific outfit, made friendship bracelets to trade with other Swifties, and overall was looking forward to it a lot. After all, she had been a fan of Taylor Swift since her “Red” album, which was released in 2012 (unless she was talking about the re-release, which happened in 2021).
In addition to all this anticipation, the author’s friends were going with her and were counting on her for a hotel, car rental, and similar things. So, her canceling this trip would impact them too.
Image credits: Stephen Mease / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Still, the original poster’s apology wasn’t enough for the SIL. She went off saying that she hoped that when the OP’s mom died, everyone would abandon her, just as she felt abandoned then.
Feeling abandoned after losing a loved one is a normal feeling. Here, on Quora, one woman shared how she, just like the OP’s SIL, felt like an orphan after she lost her parents. She said that no matter how prepared for the loss you are, sometimes it’s simply not enough.
Knowing that the sister-in-law in the story didn't have anyone in her blood family besides her late mom makes it even more understandable why she felt abandoned. Now she only has her husband and his family.
The grieving woman also felt mad, which led to her snapping, which is also understandable knowing her circumstances – grief tends to make people angry.
So, the OP didn’t take her sister-in-law’s words to heart, as she remembered how chaotic she acted when she lost her dad. But quite a few netizens did take it to heart. They were insulted on the author’s behalf by the SIL’s words wishing for her abandonment.
After all, the original poster didn’t completely abandon her sister-in-law – she took care of her the first day, but she should be allowed to resume her life, especially when it comes to such an anticipated event. So, her actions were kind of justifiable and she shouldn’t feel too guilty.
At the same time, other netizens thought that some of the folks were too harsh on the SIL. It should be taken into account that she was in the initial grieving stages and might have been reacting to things a bit irrationally. After some time she might be able to rethink the whole situation and realize how hurtful her words were.
Well, let’s hope she does and that the women will be able to fix their relationship without too much chaos and hurt for both them and the people around them.
The woman still headed out to the concert, but then was riddled with guilt, which netizens said she shouldn't feel, seeing how nasty her sister-in-law was to her
