Many times, it so happens that when a couple fights, it’s the kids who also have to suffer the consequences. Because believe it or not, adult fights massively impact children. But when a partner or ex-partner is not being cooperative, there’s not much a person can do except give them a taste of their own medicine.
And the original poster (OP) did the same by refusing to drive the kids to her ex-husband’s house as he wouldn’t pay child support. Well, he was extremely furious and started saying vile things to her.
More info: Reddit
The poster of this story has teenagers and her ex can't drive, but it was his day to have the kids, so he expected her to drive them to his house
Image credits: freepik / freepik (not the actual photo)
The ex-husband has been withholding the child maintenance money that he owes her and using derogatory language while texting her
Image credits: ThrowRANervous_
Image credits: senivpetro / freepik (not the actual photo)
As the poster refused to drive the kids to his house, he said that she was stopping him from seeing them
Image credits: ThrowRANervous_
But she said that since it was his day to have them, he could come and pick them up as his new partner has a car
In today’s story, our female protagonist ThrowRANervous_ tells us about her toxic ex-husband and we realize why he’s the ex. Her children are teenagers and it was her ex’s day to have them over. Well, he “expected” them to be dropped off at his house, which is around 8 miles away, so a 20-minute drive.
Now, the ex doesn’t drive and doesn’t have a license. And he has also been withholding the child maintenance money that he owes her. On top of that, he called OP a money-grabbing jerk and used really foul language while texting her. The poster also commented later that he used to mistreat her financially and mentally when they were married.
It must be quite annoying to go through it, even now that they're no longer together. He even claimed that by not driving their kids to him, she was stopping him from seeing them. But she said that she was in no way stopping them, she was just refusing to drive them. And anyway, why should she, when it was his day to have them over, so his responsibility?
So she informed him that she was no longer going to drive them and if he wanted, he could come and pick them up as his new partner has a car. Well, this did work, as OP updated later that he was coming in the afternoon to pick them up, presumably with his partner.
OP also updated that after posting the story, she reported him to Child Maintenance Service and requested to switch to collect and pay from his wages. For this, he’d have to pay an additional 20%, but he did pay what he was supposed to directly to the poster.
Image credits: freepik / freepik (not the actual photo)
After the poster vented on Reddit, people were quite furious with the man and his abysmal behavior towards her. But they were most worried about their kids. They felt that the children were suffering without any fault of theirs as they had to witness all the terrible things between the adults.
It has been observed, “When parents repeatedly use hostile strategies with each other, some children can become distraught, worried, anxious, and hopeless. Others may react outwardly with anger, becoming aggressive, and develop behavior problems at home and at school.”
Well, it seems like the Redditors’ worries were justifiable and the adults’ fight might adversely impact them. OP mentioned that she had spoken to the kids about all this and she was forced to ask for the money from him. And while he earns quite a lot, she has been hustling with 2 jobs and earning minimum wage. So, we can understand how terrible she must be feeling in all this.
As per MedicalNewsToday, “Verbal abuse is a form of emotional abuse in which a person uses words or threats to gain or maintain power and control over someone. Being on the receiving end of verbal abuse can cause emotional or psychological harm, making a person question their own intelligence, value, or self-worth.”
It looks like the ex’s foul language is already taking a toll on the poster as she mentioned that he made her feel like a jerk. But many folks empathized with her and advised her to use co-parenting apps rather than letting him text her and continuously mistreat her.
If you were in the poster’s shoes, how would you handle a toxic ex-partner? Also, if you have any advice for OP, just drop down everything in the comments section.
Netizens said that he is just a lazy, arrogant person and they're glad that he's her ex, they also advised using co-parenting apps to avoid him
Image credits: freepik / freepik (not the actual photo)
