When you have roommates, there will inevitably be at least a bit of friction between all of you, whether due to unfinished chores or mismatches in your lifestyle and schedules. However, what’s infuriating is if they have their partner over all of the time and the person contributes (almost) nothing to the household, rent, or utilities. They basically become a new, unexpected (and subsidized) roommate.
Video creator @k3tchhh went viral after sharing her nightmare apartment situation in a video that racked up millions of views online. She explained how her roommate’s boyfriend has been living in her apartment for a whopping 8 months now, and asked the internet for advice. Scroll down for the full story. Bored Panda reached out to @k3tchhh for further comment, and she was kind enough to answer our questions. You'll find her thoughts as you read on.
A woman went viral after opening up online about the bizarre situation at home with her roommate's partner
Image credits: k3tchhh
She felt frustrated that he essentially lived there all the time, for free
Image credits: Pressmaster (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Garakta-Studio (not the actual photo)
Image credits: k3tchhh
You can watch the viral video in full right over here
We were curious whether @k3tchhh expected such a massive response to her video on TikTok. She told Bored Panda that it took her completely by surprise.
"No, I definitely did not expect it to blow up in the way that it did," she told us.
"I think so many people resonated with the story because this happens to people all the time," @k3tchhh said.
She added that, from her perspective, this lack of respect for each other's boundaries is "mostly girls doing this to other girl roommates."
Bored Panda also asked @k3tchhh for her thoughts on getting along with roommates, as well as the signs that someone might be great to live with.
She noted that proper communication is incredibly important from the get-go. "Communicate from the beginning! If you notice something wrong, stop it right away!" she shared.
"Don't let it continue on because you could get in trouble for being complacent later," @k3tchhh told us.
"A sign of a good roommate is one who has basic respect, decency, and courtesy for you. If they're missing that, it's a huge red flag right away," she advised.
The video got over 4.7 million likes at the time of writing, and @k3tchhh later posted a couple more clips as follow-ups about the situation.
She also started a campaign on GoFundMe where she asked anyone who’s feeling generous to pitch in and donate money to her.
“You might also be familiar with my bad roommate situation. I have come to the point where I realized I need to get out as soon as possible! I am currently trying to find apartments I can move into right away,” she wrote.
“This is a very unexpected expense for me and my family. Many of you have been kind enough to express wanting to help me in my situation, so this fund is the best way to do that. Thank you to everyone willing to support me.”
To put it simply, if your roommates’ partners' names aren’t on the lease, then you need to sit down and come up with some clear rules for how often they can visit. If you get on the same page ASAP, you can avoid a lot of headaches further down the line.
And, if your roommates’ partners visit incredibly often, you should set out how much they should pitch in with the household chores, the grocery budget, etc.
Meanwhile, if they want to live at the apartment permanently, they should then talk with the landlord about signing a lease and paying rent and utilities officially.
Of course, before all of that, they should talk with the other people living there first to get their permission. Sure, you might have signed up to live with a friend or two, but having their partners over as well might make the place incredibly crowded.
Just because someone is a pal of yours doesn’t automatically mean that you’ll instantly click with their boyfriend or girlfriend. You might be completely different people and butt heads all the time. Or they might have super annoying habits. Or they might be perfectly fine, decent people that you’d be fine hanging out with… but not living with.
The situation can feel uncomfortable and chaotic in some cases, especially if the unwanted roommates eat your food, leave a mess at home, use your stuff, and hog your space. It can make someone consider whether they should simply move out altogether.
To put it bluntly, you should feel comfortable in your own home. And you shouldn’t feel like you’re paying rent on behalf of someone who’s just squatting there. It’s unfair.
According to Rent.com, a frank but friendly conversation is enough to get things back under control when there’s a cohabitation problem. It’s important to keep an open mind, stay as calm as possible, and avoid getting offended.
Ideally, everyone who’s living together should be open and honest both about their relationship status as well as their expectations for behavior before anyone signs the lease. It’s good to have some ground rules ahead of time, even if everyone’s single.
You could, for example, decide on limiting the number of nights per week that everyone’s partners are allowed to come over or sleep over. Meanwhile, you should also talk about noise level expectations after certain hours.
Next, talk about amenity use (e.g., sitting on the couch, doing laundry, using the shower, etc.), utility fee reimbursement, and how much of a heads up you want before your roommates invite their partners over on a specific day.
Some incredibly common roommate issues, as per Rent.com, include:
- A significant other who stays in the apartment too often;
- A significant other and a roommate who don’t get along;
- A significant other who uses common spaces, like the living room, kitchen, and bathroom too often, or to the detriment of roommates’ schedules;
- A significant other who incurs utility expenses (i.e. takes too many hot showers or leaves lights on) that he or she never chips in to cover;
- A significant other who eats your food without asking or replacing it;
- A significant other who makes you feel uncomfortable, whether through insensitive or inappropriate comments or actions;
- A significant other who makes messes and fails to clean them up.
Have you ever had issues with your roommates bringing their significant others over? Have you ever been in a nightmare situation where they just started living in your home without paying rent or anything?
How did you resolve the situation? What are the best and worst roommates that you’ve ever had? Let us know in the comments below!
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
A few internet users disagreed with the woman's take on the roommate situation
However, many other people were completely on her side and gave her advice
