50 Times People Found Things They Shouldn’t Have While Clearing Dead People’s Things

The OP told Bored Panda that they haven’t been in a situation of finding anything shocking about a deceased loved one themselves. The reason they decided to start the thread on such a topic was based more on their own life. “I was going through my own childhood stuff and wondered what picture it would paint of me if someone else was doing it,” they said.

The redditor shared that they were surprised about how many wholesome responses they received from the online community. That might be because, according to the author of 'The Secret Life of Secrets', Assoc. Prof. Michael Slepian, the most common reason for secrecy is protection.

“By keeping secrets, people often intend to protect their relationships, such as by protecting someone's feelings (not wanting to hurt someone) or by protecting one's reputation in the eyes of others (not wanting to look bad in front of others),” he explained in a recent interview.

Michael Slepian suggested that one of the reasons people often want to know someone’s secret is the natural curiosity to learn about the things that are hidden away. “We look at a wrapped gift for us under the Christmas tree, and we can't help but wonder what's inside,” he pointed out.

The expert believes that it’s uncommon for a person to plan to take their secret to their grave; and even though their goal might be to keep a secret forever, sometimes they get discovered nevertheless.

“I've heard multiple stories now of people learning of their parents' secrets after they've passed away. One of the drawbacks of taking a secret to the grave is that there is absolutely no chance for the person who learns the secret to discuss it with the secret keeper.

“I recently learned of a secret my grandmother had been keeping—a family secret that involved me—and I wish she hadn't. She's passed away now, but if I had learned the secret sooner, I could have told her that her concerns were not warranted. I could have made her feel much better about it, if we had the chance to discuss it,” Slepian shared.

“Family secrets are among the most common kinds of secrets, and so it is perfectly normal to have a family secret that others who are outside the family don't know about. Keeping secrets from family members is also highly common,” the author of 'The Secret Life of Secrets' pointed out, adding that family life and relationships tend to get complicated; so does life, in general.

“If learning of a family secret is to drop a major bombshell into the family, it's likely family members will need to cope with the new information. One of the main reasons why our secrets so often hurt us is that we tend to not cope effectively with them, because we try to do it on our own without others' help. Healthy coping comes from discussions with trusted others. Discussing the information with others can make a world of difference.”