“I’m Taking That One To The Grave”: 30 Things People Are Keeping Secret From Their Spouse

I witnessed my son walking for the first time about a month before she saw him walk. She was struggling with post partum depression and upset she wasn’t the mom she wanted to be. I’m taking that one to the grave.

I worked very hard with my kids to ensure their first word was Mama. When she wasn’t around I was going, “ma-ma-ma-ma” to the kids. Being a mom is everything to her, and I wanted her to have that cherished moment of being the first word they said. I will never tell her that.

I let my wife experience all the big things with the kids first. She’s a shift worker covering both day and night 12 hour shifts and no two weeks of roster are ever the same, so we have a rather sporadic home life where we are all home at the same time. If the kids have happened to have done any of the milestone events when it’s just been me at home I’ve kept quiet about it and been excited (genuinely) when she’s witnessed them “first” and calls me in the room or tells me about it. I figure it helps her not feel like she’s missing out on the family.

I'm sure I'm too late for this to be seen. One day I woke up with a blocked ear, had a shower and let the warm water run into my ear. Small spider came out and ear instantly unblocked.

If I told my partner this she'd literally never sleep again.

If someone talks s**t about them (your family, friends) you don’t need to tell them. You can stand up for them and leave it at that; I don’t need to hear every thought my MIL has about our wedding.

Action_Nad replied:
I'm the opposite. I give my wife full details so we can shark-attack their punk a**es together.

On the day I got married my dad pulled me aside and gave me this one piece of advice “you don’t have to tell her everything.” I was flummoxed, did my dad have a secret family in Florida that he was visiting on those long business trips? No, thirty years later I realized he didn’t mean “keep secrets” he meant “don’t always tell her dinner tastes burned, don’t always tell her when someone says something mean about her, don’t always tell her that the children clothes look dumb.” Of course it would have helped a lot if he had actually said that but perhaps he wanted me to learn the hard way. This morning my wife asked me “now, be serious does this dress look nice or does it look like I’m trying too hard to look like a teenager?” I honestly thought she looked great, and I told her.

My husband has no idea how many times I eat a cheeseburger on the way home from work. That's the only acceptable secret to keep.

VicePrincipalNero replied:
My mother-in-law was an appallingly awful cook who grew up in the Depression and refused to throw away food, no matter how bad it was
After they died, I was going through decades' worth of old paperwork. I discovered that my father-in-law would stop at Burger King every single day for a survival meal during his daily walks.

I take care of the bills. My husband has no clue about any of our bills. I've been secretly overpaying our mortgage by $800 every month for over a year, going to principal. I'll continue to do so. And then one day it will be a nice surprise.

That someone you dated in the past was better than your current partner in some way.

If the other person was smarter or better in bed or funnier or whatever, don’t f*****g ever say it. Ever.

That the reason the dog has horrible farts wasn't because 'dogs just do that sometimes', it's because I needed to get rid of leftover black beans and he was there.

This may be a contentious topic but your spouse isn’t your therapist. Some things are above their pay grade.

An emergency gift stash for when the partner has a bad day. My emergency stash for my wife is mostly chocolate.

fluffyfistoffury replied:
As soon as my wife figured out I had a secret chocolate stash for her bad days, she started 'having bad days' more often just to get all the chocolate. Then she got upset when it was all gone.

I was given s**t in another sub when I said I'd never told my husband any details of the horrible bullying I experienced in school. I'm not comfortable divulging that, and it isn't something he needs to know.

I’ve been playing Mario Kart 200cc by myself for a few years now. I’m really good. My husband beats me all the time, but it’s usually because I let him. It’s my deathbed secret.

lackaface replied:
That’s cute, but f**k that. When I game with my man, I’m out for blood. Same with the kids.

If you cheated, ever, and it’s long over and you’re feeling like you need to come clean with the truth, do not tell me. If I didn’t know and it was a decade ago, l don’t want to.

I once saw someone make a confession bedside in the ER as a traffic accident victim was slipping away, and I will never forget how hurt she looked. We (ER staff) were there to hear her later say why the f**k did he bother telling her that, and you know what, we agreed. She coded the same night and that was that.

not married but i rarely tell my bf that he's already told me a story/explained something about one of his interests to me before. it's so cute to see him get excited about it and a lot of the time i'll pick up on details i didn't get the previous times and learn something new.

That you would, in fact, not love them if they were a worm

Sure_Ad_9858 replied:
My partner said he would build me a ‘worm sanctuary’ and allow me to live in a tank at his home so I wouldn't die on the streets. I found that very sweet. I told him he could date other people, and thanks for not letting me die.

The size and nature of your bowel movements please if you are my husband reading this honey please no

Extremely_unlikeable replied:
Please ask my boyfriend not to send pictures, even if it looks like a heart.

spooky_upstairs replied:
But romance.

Spoilers for a show you have watched before, but are rewatching with them.

Fredx7_2 replied:
My wife and I are watching Game of Thrones at the moment, which is my first time. She’ll say, 'If you don’t do XYZ chore, I’ll tell you what happens to Joffrey/Jon/Sansa/etc.' (This is all good-natured and fun, btw.)

Other people who are romantically interested in you. They may exist. The fact that they're interested in you may even be flattering and offer a temporary boost to your self-esteem. Your partner doesn't need to know about each time you're flirted with or if someone shows interest in you. Just state that you're happy, in love, and involved with someone, and for the love of god--don't reciprocate. Just smile, say thank you, and keep it moving.

Your partner doesn't want to feel like they have a steady stream of competition all because some random a*s person said you had nice arms or a nice smile or whatevs.