Making friends as a kid has got to be one of the easiest things possible. The tricky part is holding onto those friendships as you get older. Sometimes drama or conflict can ruin a good connection with a friend, which is a very painful experience, even if it’s all part of growing up.
This is a difficult thing to witness as a parent, and many moms and dads may feel like they have to rescue their kids from such situations. This is exactly what one mom went through when her daughter felt left out by her best friends.
More info: Mumsnet
It’s tough to be made to feel like you’re the odd one out from your friend group, nobody wants to be put in such a situation
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster explained that her 11-year-old autistic daughter Sarah had been best friends with a girl named Molly since they were three years old, and became friends with a girl named Poppy through her
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
One day Molly had to attend a birthday party but she didn’t mention whose it was, Sarah later learned it was Poppy’s party because both the girls video called her from it
Image credits: Ron Lach / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster felt like it was mean for the girls to call Sarah during the party and also hide that it was happening in the first place
Image credits: Treacle2024
Sarah was heartbroken over the incident, but even though her mom felt the situation was uncalled for, she wondered if her daughter was being too sensitive about all that went down
This situation is tough because it almost seems like Sarah’s best friends were rubbing salt in the wound by video calling her from a party she wasn’t invited to. So, it makes sense that she was hurt. The problem is that her mom felt helpless seeing all this going down and wondering what to do to relieve her daughter’s pain.
To help us gain insight into how these situations should be handled, Bored Panda contacted JoAnn Crohn (M.Ed), a parenting educator and certified life coach who helps moms feel confident in raising empowered kids while also pursuing their own goals. She’s the founder of a company called ‘No Guilt Mom’ along with being an accomplished writer, author, speaker, and podcast host.
JoAnn told us that “phrases like ‘I hate them’ or ‘they’re so mean’ are completely ok when venting to a trusted adult. It’s ok for kids to be angry, mad and sad during this time. They do not have to look on the bright side and do not have to see the positive.” She also explained that psychological health comes from expressing the appropriate emotions at the appropriate time.
It must have been tough for the poster to step aside and just be there for her daughter instead of fixing the situation. JoAnn mentioned that “friend drama is a tricky one for parents. The best role for parents to take is to be there emotionally for their kids and to physically comfort them.”
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The mom told commenters that her daughter, Sarah, has special needs. She is neurodivergent, wears leg splits, and has a nasal tube as well. That’s probably why the poster was so worried about her being excluded even further, especially by the two girls with whom she was friends.
It might seem counterproductive, but JoAnn said: “in regards to how much parents should get involved in their kid's friendships, my best advice is to stay out of it as much as possible. Physically, parents just need to be available and at their kid’s side if needed. If the parent can’t be available, another trusted adult can fill this role too.”
Some netizens felt that Molly and Poppy were being spiteful and had purposely called Sarah while the party was on to make her feel bad about not being there. JoAnn said to “look for signs of bullying, which is a repeated instance of these girls rubbing her daughter’s nose in things. If this is happening over and over again, I recommend talking to her daughter’s teacher.”
Every parent wants to protect their child from situations like this, but sometimes, children need to figure out what to do next on their own. What would you have done if you were in the mom’s shoes? Let us know your thoughts in the comments.
Netizens sided with Sarah and did not think she was unreasonable for feeling hurt or betrayed that Molly and Poppy had attended the party together
