We form some of the strongest bonds with the people we grow up with, basically, our siblings. As we stay together, we constantly quarrel about small things like toys, food, who is mom’s or dad’s favorite, etc. Quarrels between siblings remain constant but the reasons change as we grow up. While some siblings grow out of these quarrels, there are a few siblings who like to impose their opinions on another sibling.
The Redditor in this story talks about how his siblings expect him to childproof his house for their kids. This angers him as it's his own house that he bought to live in with his sick parent. And when he refused to do so, his siblings called him inconsiderate and tried to impose their opinions on him.
More info: Reddit
The poster is a single man with no kids whose parent is very sick, and as no one else offered, he took his parent in to live with him in a new house
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
He wishes to furnish his new house, which has turned into a place for the whole family to congregate, however, his siblings are pushing him to make it kid-friendly
Image credits: u/monstargaryen
Image credits: Max Vakhtbovycn (not the actual photo)
He's annoyed because he wants to get the furniture of his choice and he thinks that his siblings should either look after their kids or not bring them to his house
Image credits: u/monstargaryen
Image credits: Vlada Karpovich (not the actual photo)
Siblings call the man inconsiderate but he tells them that they should look after their own kids instead of telling him what to buy
Image credits: u/monstargaryen
In this story, Redditor Monstargaryen talked about his trouble with his siblings. He started by mentioning that he is a single-income person with no kids but has a very sick parent. As no one else in the family offered, he took in his parent to live with him. And he was quite happy about it.
As he got a new house for himself and his parent to live in, he wanted to furnish it to his liking. But now, his house has become the family spot where everyone gathers and his siblings have issues with his furnishing choices. They have been pushing him really hard to make his house kid-friendly just for their kids.
And guess what happened? He got really annoyed about it, and understandably so! When people buy a new house, they have this image in their heads about how they want their perfect house to be. And when denied this dream, despite having your own house, anyone would be frustrated.
OP mentioned how he didn’t have any desire to bubble-wrap things and just wanted to display and buy whatever he wanted. Also, he pointed out that he didn’t want to buy some boring couch so that it wouldn’t be too much if the siblings’ kids easily destroyed it.
And when he told his siblings that he didn’t want to cater things to their kids’ habits, they said that he was not being “considerate”. They even went on to accuse him of keeping him from visiting their sick parent just because he wasn’t childproofing his house
This must have frustrated him further and he told them that they or their significant other had to look after the kids here or at their own houses instead of telling him what to buy. He stressed that as long as he pays the bills, he will furnish it the way he wants.
Then he vented online and asked Redditors if he was the jerk for not allowing his siblings and their kids to decide what to buy for his own house. And the Redditors all came to his rescue!
Image credits: Vika Glitter (not the actual photo)
They claimed that his siblings cannot impose their opinions on the poster in this way. It's his house and he is the one who gets to decide how to furnish it. Author and self-esteem and relationship coach Natalie Lue mentions that when someone is imposing something upon you, they’re trying to remove your choice and overstepping your boundaries.
Netizens also pointed out that he needs to set boundaries with his siblings and if they want to bring their kids, they should control them and not let them destroy anything in the house. Stanford University states, “Boundaries help determine what is and is not okay in a relationship–whether that be with friends, partners, co-workers, bosses, or family members. Ideally, we put them in place to protect our well-being. They help us to build trust, safety, and respect in relationships.”
As the Redditors said, it looks like the poster should consider setting these boundaries. Some folks also pointed out the parenting habits of the poster’s siblings. They said that the siblings should keep a watchful eye on their kids and ask them to behave properly before they destroy something. According to Healthline, when children have little or no discipline, these are signs of bad parenting. Such kids are left to fend for themselves, which can result in injuries and also create children who don’t understand boundaries.
From all the input given by peeps online, it looks like the siblings need to discipline their kids rather than impose their opinions on the man and tell him how to furnish his own house. They are not only annoying the poster, but their bad parenting is also having a negative impact on their kids. PsychCentral states that kids with no discipline can develop issues like no control over limits and pushing them. They also have a higher likelihood of breaking the law when growing up, which sounds quite distressing.
By the looks of it, the poster setting boundaries against his siblings and their kids sounds like the healthiest solution. However, the siblings' willingness to accept these boundaries can also be questioned. Some commentators also went on to suggest that he should bill his siblings if their kids break anything. But before we jump over to the comments, we would like to hear from you. How did you feel after reading this? Do you think the poster is in the right? Don’t forget to let us know in the comments!
Folks online backed him up and declared that he was not in the wrong, instead the siblings should get their own kids in line
