It’s been said that you can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family. This can make things tricky when it comes to in-laws you don’t always see eye to eye with. Love it or hate it, you’re most likely stuck with them, and the relationship, for life.
One woman almost reached the end of her tether over the Christmas holidays when her sister-in-law insisted on questioning every little thing she ate or drank. Not wanting to upset her brother, she held her tongue but still turned to netizens for advice.
More info: Mumsnet
Siblings-in-law can be a handful, as this woman found out the hard way over her Christmas break
Image credits: Flo Dahm / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Despite working out and usually eating quite well, her sister-in-law still thought it was appropriate to remark on every little thing she ate or drank
Image credits: Julia M Cameron / Pexels (not the actual photo)
When the sister-in-law made a snide comment to the woman’s husband, he didn’t laugh and politely told her to mind her own business
Image credits: Kampus Production / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The woman didn’t want to upset her brother who she says had had a tough few weeks, so she held her tongue
Image credits: TitaniasA*s
Infuriated by her sister-in-law’s endless remarks, she turned to netizens for advice on how to handle the increasingly awkward situation
OP begins her story by telling the community that her dear brother (DB) and sister-in-law (SIL) came to celebrate Christmas with them for a few days and were due to leave the next day. She adds that although she gets on well with her sister-in-law, she’s almost reached her limit over her constant remarks about what she chooses to eat.
According to OP, she eats healthily and runs 4 times a week, a habit she’s kept up over the festive period. She goes on to say that she tries to take a fairly balanced approach to food and drink and she’s certainly not overweight. That being said, she adds that it’s Christmas and she’s overindulged a bit but isn’t too fazed about it.
The issue, OP says, is that her sister-in-law has been constantly criticizing every little thing she chooses to eat and drink, even resorting to making a backhanded remark to OP’s husband, which didn’t go down very well.
OP says she’s tried laughing it off, but that she’s now quite sick of it. She goes on to say that she adores her brother and doesn’t want to do anything to upset him (especially since he’s recently had a tough few weeks) but that she’s not sure she can handle another 24 hours of her sister-in-law’s rude remarks.
She concludes her post by asking the community whether she should try to put a stop to her sister-in-law’s snide remarks or just suck it up until her guests leave.
Image credits: Los Muertos Crew / Pexels (not the actual photo)
From what OP tells us in her post, her sister-in-law’s behavior seems inappropriate at best and toxic at worst. By constantly harassing OP, she’s contributing to an uncomfortable atmosphere in what should be a time for celebrating family and togetherness.
If you’ve ever had to deal with a problematic in-law, you can probably relate to OP’s story. So, what’s the best way for her to deal with the increasingly awkward situation? We went looking for answers.
In her article for Aish, Sarah Pachter lists several ways to deal with a toxic sister-in-law. According to Pachter, if your sister-in-law is rude, exclusive, or outright cruel, don’t engage - rather stay elevated and gracious. The most detrimental thing she can do is goad you into behaving negatively out of character, so don’t let her.
In her article for Happier Human, Sarah Kristenson writes that when your sister-in-law is a toxic person, it’s hard to know whether you should tell your husband or your brother (if she’s his wife). In certain instances, Kristenson says, you’ll risk looking jealous and petty if you expose how toxic she is or how uncomfortable she makes you.
That being said, OP is well within her rights to set some boundaries. With a calm approach and some well-chosen words, she can win the day, stand firm, and earn the respect of her family for handling such an obviously challenging scenario with grace and compassion.
How would you handle the situation if you were in OP’s shoes? Do you think she should keep her mouth shut, or let her sister-in-law have it? Let us know your opinion in the comments!
In the comments, readers slammed the woman’s sister-in-law for being rude and advised the woman to smother her with kindness but never have her stay over again
