![“[Am I The Jerk] For Telling My Sister I Won’t Raise Her Child After She Abandoned Him?”](https://img.boredpanda.com/unsafe/rs:fit:3840:0/q:80/aHR0cHM6Ly9zdGF0aWMuYm9yZWRwYW5kYS5jb20vYmxvZy93cC1jb250ZW50L3VwbG9hZHMvMjAyNC8xMC9zaXN0ZXItY2hpbGQtYWJhbmRvbm1lbnQtcGFyZW50cy1jb3Zlcl82NzUuanBn.webp)
In my opinion, one of the most important skills of any person is the ability to learn: from other people's and your own experience, from successes and mistakes. And the realization that many obvious pieces of "practical wisdom" are actually damn right is also about the ability to learn. For example, the statement that parenthood is, first of all, an incredibly big responsibility.
Well, the user u/lunalieee, the author of the story that we're going to tell you today, hardly expected that by the age of 21, she would have to face a demand from her parents to become the guardian of her little nephew. Keep in mind that the kid's mom is alive and well, but simply decided to "find herself..."
More info: Reddit
The author of the post is a 21-year-old student whose elder sis recently disappeared to 'find herself,' leaving her toddler to her parents
Image credits: Julia Caesar / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The parents, however, are not that young, so it's quite difficult for them to take care of a 4-year-old boy
Image credits: lunalieee
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
So the parents started hinting and then demanding that the youngest daughter 'step in' and become the kid's guardian
Image credits: lunalieee
Image credits: Bruno Gomiero / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The author, meanwhile, isn't that well-off, and it wasn't actually her plan to become a parent at 21
Image credits: lunalieee
The parents urge the author to 'grow up and take responsibility' and the sis called her too and begged her not to 'abandon the family'
So, the Original Poster (OP), as we have already said, is 21 years old, she studies in college, works part-time and, let's be honest, barely makes ends meet. This is the reality for many people nowadays, but now we are talking about another thing.
Like about the author's older sister, who has always been, in her own words, "more 'free-spirited' than responsible," and who recently left her 4-year-old son in the care of her parents - and simply disappeared. She wrote a long, vague letter about wanting to "find herself," packed her things and went somewhere.
The parents of the women, the author goes on with her story, are already quite elderly, and it's becoming more and more difficult for them to cope with the toddler. You also guessed what the story is about, right? Yeah, that's right, that the parents first began to hint, and then directly tell their youngest daughter that it would be nice for her to "step in."
No, don't get me wrong - our heroine is not at all against babysitting the nephew, or helping her parents with his care, but becoming a full-fledged guardian at 21, while she is still studying and, let's be honest, is quite short on money, was clearly not part of her plans.
And guess who the parents are advising to "grow up" and "take full responsibility?" That's right, the original poster, and not her sis! And when the absentee momma finally called, after hearing the whole story, she advised the OP "not to abandon the family..."
It's worth remembering that the author is only 21 years old, and the influence of parents is still significant at this age. So, despite the confidence in her decision, the woman still feels a bit guilty, and decided to ask for netizens' opinions on how right she is here.
Image credits: Helena Lopes / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Well, the statistics on abandoned children throughout the whole world look incredibly sad - after all, according to Gutnux data, approximately 140 million children worldwide are orphaned over child abandonment. And, according to the same source, "children who are abandoned are more likely to struggle with attachment and trust issues."
At the same time, the situation described here doesn't quite fit the "classic" example. After all, this boy's mother disappeared when he was already 4 years old. And he also has relatives who willy-nilly step in. Yet, it's unlikely that the guardian of this kid will be able to expect any child support here.
The statistics are relentless - less than half (45.9%) of custodial parents entitled to child support received full payments, as Warren & Migliaccio attorney company's official website claims. Some children are quite lucky - they have wealthy relatives. But here, in the situation we described, everything is pretty different...
People in the comments to the original post expressed support for the author and confirmed that she is doing everything right. "Your sister is more than likely the way she is because of being enabled by your parents. You do not owe her this... harsh reality, but if she does not want him... it's on her... she can give up her parental rights," one of the responders told her rather reasonably.
And commenters also advise her to get social services involved. “I hate to suggest this, but call social services. Report that he’s been abandoned and that your parents are pushing you to take him in and you can’t,” another commenter wrote. "This will either bring your sister back, or force your parents to take full responsibility for him, or he’ll go into the system." And what would you, our dear readers, do in such a case?
People in the comments, however, sided with the author unanimously, and even suggested she get social services involved here
