The holiday season is supposed to be a time of warmth and joy, but expecting mother and Reddit user Prize-Ad3917 might spend it alone.
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Even though the woman is due at the end of December, her fiancé plans to leave her and go on a vacation with his family.
Since the Redditor doesn't want to be all by herself during this time of year, she's asking her partner to stay; however, this request has strained her relationship with her in-laws, putting her in a difficult position.
So she made a post on the subreddit 'Am I the [Jerk]?' asking its members if she's really out of line.
Christmas is about getting together with the people you love
Image credits: vladans (not the actual photo)
But this woman might be spending the holidays alone because her partner wants to be with his family instead
Image credits: djoronimo (not the actual photo)
Image source: Prize-Ad3917
Vicki Broadbent of Honest Mum is shocked at how insensitive and ill-prepared this man is about his partner's due date
Image credits: honestmum.com
To get a better understanding of the whole ordeal, we contacted our parenting expert Vicki Broadbent. She's an award-winning writer, director, and bestselling author of Mumboss (UK) and The Working Mom (US and Canada) and has had babies arrive 3 weeks and 6 days early, not once but twice with her first and third baby!
"No one can predict a baby's arrival. It is clear that whenever the baby arrives, the pregnant lady will require both emotional and physical support," the mom explained to Bored Panda. "I needed my husband to tie my laces in the final month, as do most women. Furthermore, to leave her alone at Christmas is thoughtless."
According to Broadbent, pregnant women are naturally more vulnerable and emotional due to their hormones and should not be left to feel isolated and lonely.
"I question why his family would pressure the man to leave his wife," she said. This is inhumane behavior."
In this case, two days is way too short of a window
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)
Indeed, even if you carefully tracked ovulation and know when your baby was conceived, your due date is still an estimate, because, just as the author of the post said, every pregnancy is different.
This was demonstrated in a 2013 study in which researchers estimated the due dates of 125 women from the United States who were trying to conceive.
They pinpointed the days they had ovulated by testing their urinary hormone levels and then carefully followed their pregnancies. Even with this exact date, there was still five weeks of variability in the length of pregnancies.
So the Redditor's partner might very well miss the birth of their child.
Furthermore, during the third trimester, getting comfortable at night can be a problem, and the difficulty with sleep as well as fatigue can lead to mood swings. Fears and worries about the upcoming birth can get really intense, along with different emotions that come with thoughts about becoming a mother.
Spending the holidays alone could further exacerbate these feelings, putting even more weight on the woman's shoulders.
"It is vital to have a village around you for support both emotionally and physically whilst pregnant and during that first year postpartum and beyond," Vicki Broadbent added.
"This feels like a feminist issue. Women are expected to just 'get on with it.' I wonder how men would be treated if they had to endure pregnancy symptoms, birth, and post-birth recovery. I was required to have an emergency c-section and couldn't walk properly or drive for weeks. Pregnant women require support. It's as simple as that," she said.
People who have read her story think that the woman was completely entitled to ask her partner to stay
