While some folks could say a lot of things about alcohol, one thing is always for certain: it’s an optional pleasure in life.
Those who don’t partake in it, or maybe prefer non-alcoholic versions, are not at odds with those who enjoy a glass or a bottle… or a keg. It all boils down to how you want to live your life and it shouldn’t be a given either way.
Well, some people might beg to differ. So much, in fact, that they might resort to passive-aggressive Venmo requests to the amount of $75.
The idea of a party implies that there might be alcohol in it, but we live in an age where that doesn’t have to be the case
Image credits: Kenny Eliason (not the actual photo)
For some, it’s hard to accept a non-alcoholic policy and so they try to “fix” it at the [$75] expense of the host
Image credits: Kevin Malik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
Image credits: NotABoozinSusan
While the host didn’t warn guests about the partially-dry house party rule, she didn’t feel like paying $75 just because she’s the host
The story goes that Redditor u/NotABoozinSusan hosted a Halloween party. She chose not to serve alcohol because she doesn’t drink, but made sure there are other snacks and drinks available.
While her friends and family know about and respect this, her coworkers were not all aware of it. This was by no means a prohibition for guests as they could still bring their own drinks if they wanted to.
However, it seems nobody did, and OP’s friend Kev felt it was his duty to make sure alcohol reaches the thirsty party people by going to the store and buying everyone drinks.
Afterwards, he gave a stern talking to OP about how she should’ve made sure there is alcohol available because bandwagon, and she should be cool about it. He also proceeded to Venmo her a $75 request to compensate Kev for his booze run. The story soon ended up on Reddit for people to judge.
Image credits: Mary Taylor (not the actual photo)
Folks were mostly on the party host’s side, save for forgetting to tell people it’s a BYOB (Bring Your Own Booze) affair
Minus not practicing effective communication and simply not thinking of telling people it’s a BYOB party, folks online understood and supported OP. In OP’s defense, though, she never had a problem like this before, and has been to a number of parties with varying degrees of alcohol servings, so it just never crossed her mind.
Folks online didn’t think OP was responsible for paying for the drinks—especially since she was not partaking in them anyway—but also because $75 felt like a lot, if Kev is asking to cover half. And that would be quite a lot of booze—like black out drunk for some. But Kev never provided a receipt, all the while only bringing two bottles of tequila and whiskey, and a six pack.
Mostly, folks hinted at the argument that Kev had the idea to buy everyone a round (or seven?) of drinks at his own expense without consulting OP and then also hoping he’d be reimbursed for it all. That’s not how it works, man.
If anything, it’s OP’s house, it’s her rules. If someone wants a drink at this point, it’s a them problem.
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
There is nothing wrong with going BYOB, but there are some things to consider beforehand
In this day and age, it’s OK to ask party-goers to chip in on party expenses, especially if it’s something you will be partaking in. However, there are some things to keep in mind for a BYOB party as per the established etiquette.
First, and foremost, the crux of the issue: let people know that it is a BYOB party. This in turn can benefit from other bits of relevant info, like whether drinkware and ice will be provided or whether there are any guidelines on what to bring.
Speaking of which, providing mixers and garnishes, basic bar essentials, glassware, and other things to help party-goers feel less awkward if the host is not having any drinks themselves is always polite, respectful, and a huge plus as far as party etiquette goes.
Oh, and if you are actually drinking, and want to have something that someone else is having, ask. If you follow these rules, you’ll do just fine and your party will be a hoot.
With all of this in mind, we’d love to hear what you think OP should’ve done. Share your stories and takes in the comment section below!
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
The host also provided more context to the situation in the comment section
And speaking of comments, folks were mostly on the woman's side, minus her forgetting to tell people it's a BYOB party
Some folks played devil's advocate and showed how everyone involved did something wrong
And some ignored Kev altogether, saying the host was the root of all the problems by forgetting a key piece of info
