If there's someone who knows about how to stay safe, it's Tracy Schandler Walder, author of The Unexpected Spy.
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She met a CIA recruiter at a jobs fair and was signed up by the agency while a USC student and Delta Gamma sorority sister.
Tracy would spend the next five years as a covert operative for CIA's Counterterrorism Center, assuming aliases, thwarting terrorist attacks, and hiding in the trunks of cars on her way to debrief terrorists at black sites.
After her time at the agency, Tracy became a Special Agent at the FBI's Los Angeles Field Office, specializing in Chinese counterintelligence operations.
Now, she's a sought-after public speaker, but is also active on social media, and in one of her recent videos, the mother shared 7 things she would never allow her child to do, given her experience.
Meet Tracy Schandler Walder, who served as a covert operative for CIA's Counterterrorism Center and was later a Special Agent at the FBI's Los Angeles Field Office
Image credits: theunexpectedspy
Recently, the mom turned to social media to explain the things she doesn't allow her 8-year-old to do
I'm a former CIA officer, an FBI special agent, and I am a mother to an eight-year-old. And here are some things that I would not let her do, given the professions that I've had.
The first one - go to sleepaway camp. I'm not comfortable with it and she's not at an age that I am comfortable having her do that yet.
Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages (not the actual photo)
The second - have a gun in my home. It's just something that I choose not to do.
Image credits: kyddvisuals (not the actual photo)
The third - I will always, always, always lock up all of my prescription medication and my alcohol.
Image credits: skana80 (not the actual photo)
Number four, this one may be unpopular - I will always google all of the teachers that she has, any teacher or coach that's in her life, as well as the parents of the friends that she hangs out with.
The reason I do that, because I know that teachers are background checked, is because I want to understand what their social history is like, and those things don't come up on a background check.
Image credits: designmesk (not the actual photo)
Next, I would not let her walk to and from school by herself.
Image credits: Polinalebed (not the actual photo)
I also would not let her use the bathroom in a restaurant or any kind of public place by herself. I always go with her.
Image credits: iheartcreative (not the actual photo)
And then finally, currently she's at an age where I do not let her play unsupervised without an adult present.
Image credits: phammi (not the actual photo)
As mentioned, it was her career that found Tracy. "I actually went to college to be a high school history teacher but began working at the CIA immediately upon college graduation," she told Bored Panda about her experience. "I am one of the only women to have served on the operations side of both the CIA and FBI. I worked in the CIA's Counterterrorism Center and Weapons of Mass Destruction Group.
"I served 9 tours overseas, including Afghanistan, and helped stop various terrorist attacks. As I worked on the operations side, I cannot share the additional countries I worked in as I was there under cover."
Tracy started right after college, at the age of 21. "I trained at the CIA's training center, aka the Farm in weapons, defensive driving, etc. (that is all the CIA allows me to say)," she explained. "I then became a Special Agent with the FBI, specializing in Chinese counterintelligence."
Tracy then became a high school history teacher and is now an adjunct faculty of criminal justice at Texas Christian University.
Tracy's video has since gone viral
Tracy believes that being a CIA officer, FBI Special Agent, and a high school teacher adds many unique layers to her approach to parenting. "I see the tactical/physical security side having worked in extremely dangerous environments and arresting criminals. And I have taught kids in high school and seen what they deal with in regards to emotional security."
"I don't know of anyone who has had these three careers and I think that gives me a perspective from all different angles in regards to what children are facing," she said. "Additionally, my own daughter's preschool teacher is currently serving a 20-year prison sentence for downloading child pornography while he was on the school campus. As a victim, law enforcement officer, and teacher, I am keenly aware of how these influence kids and it has left quite a mark on my parenting style."
Parents indeed have plenty to worry about when it comes to their kids' well-being.
To gain a better understanding of their thoughts, the annual C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital National Poll on Children's Health asked a national sample of parents to rate their level of concern about a variety of topics.
The top 10 child health concerns for parents in 2023 are:
- Overuse of devices/screen time (67%)
- Social media (66%)
- Internet safety (62%)
- Depression/suicide (57%)
- Bullying (53%)
- Stress/anxiety (52%)
- Unhealthy diet (52%)
- Costs of healthcare/health insurance (50%)
- School violence (49%)
- Smoking/vaping (48%)
Falling just outside the top 10 are obesity (48%), guns/gun injuries (47%), lack of mental health services (47%), poverty (45%), and drinking/using drugs (44%).
The Mott Poll has released periodic reports on parents' levels of concern about a variety of health-related issues for US children and teens since 2007.
The top concerns this year center around the role of the internet in children's lives. These topics became more prominent during the pandemic, and this report shows that parental concerns still haven't faded. As demonstrated in prior Mott Poll Reports, children are using social media at younger ages, and parents struggle with how to appropriately monitor this area and help their children avoid the negative aspects of its use.
New to the top 10 is concern about the costs of healthcare for children, including the costs of getting health insurance. In recent years, federal policies required states to maintain Medicaid enrollment through the duration of the pandemic. As these requirements are ending, families that no longer qualify are facing the challenge of finding affordable coverage for their kids.
As the various reactions to Tracy Schandler Walder's video show, what's relevant to some families might not be so crucial to others, but no matter the background, we need a shared commitment from parents, communities, and policymakers to foster a safer environment for our children.
"We cannot and should not keep our kids in a bubble. That's not healthy and I fully agree that they need to learn how to cope with potentially dangerous situations and be given the tools and confidence to navigate them," Tracy said.
"However, I also do not think that we should succumb to peer and societal pressures to give kids full access to technology. It needs to be a graduated approach and appropriate to what their brain development is."
"I also think there is absolutely no shame in being keenly aware of who is around our kids. This doesn't mean we shouldn't trust people, but we should know who we are surrounding ourselves with," the mom added.
Many people support the mom's approach
But some believe it couldn't be applied to every child
