Some people only come around when they want a favor, money, or anything that can benefit them. The problem is that these kinds of folks only enjoy taking, but don’t like to help or be a source of support, which can end up making the relationship one-sided.
This is exactly what one person faced with their stepkids, who basically got cut out of their lives, until things needed to be paid for, which is when the children came crawling back. The poster didn’t want to deal with their drama anymore, so they decided to block them all.
More info: Reddit
When dealing with toxic or entitled people, it can help to create some distance so that they can no longer cause you pain anymore
Image credits: gpointstudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster had gotten married to their best friend, Katherine, so that she could get health insurance, even though her kids didn’t approve
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster eventually distanced themself from Katherine’s kids, but paid for her to visit and gift them lavishly, and also took care of her financially
Image credits: prostock-studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Unfortunately, after the poster lost Katherine, their stepkids made contact to ask whether they would be paying for them to go on a Christmas trip, and were mad when turned down
Image credits: Working_Macaron6717
Eventually, the poster blocked their stepkids and had to endure being called “petty and vindictive” by their dad
The poster truly cared for their best friend, Katherine, and they had a very close relationship because she was the first person to whom the OP came out. They were inseparable through many major life events, and finally decided to get married since Katherine did not have health insurance.
In places like the U.S., it is somewhat common for people to marry one another for health insurance, as it can be difficult to get coverage on one’s own. This kind of qualifying event can help a person get insurance sooner and also lower the costs of healthcare significantly, which can be beneficial in times of need.
Luckily, the poster was able to stand by Katherine when she needed it most and did their best to support her as much as possible. Unfortunately, the OP's stepkids didn’t seem to understand that and were against their mother’s marriage and their stepparent, which created a considerable distance in their relationship.
It can be tough to deal with toxic or rude stepchildren while also trying to be the bigger person, but experts state that the best thing to do is to set boundaries and create distance. While you don’t need to love them, you can respect their choices and not engage in any petty behavior, even if they initiate it.
Image credits: fxquadro / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Even though the OP kept a distance, their stepkids got in touch again after losing Katherine. Instead of grieving with the poster or offering support, they only asked how their gifts would be sent and whether the costs of a Christmas trip would be covered for them.
The poster tried to set boundaries with them by saying that their travel wouldn't be paid for. Instead, the OP was going to mourn Katherine on a trip with friends. Unfortunately, the kids didn’t respect their wishes and sent many rude and entitled messages, which left the poster shocked.
It’s clear that the stepchildren were only interested in the OP's money and that they were trying to get lavish gifts and trips. In situations like this, where grieving family members might come across as greedy, professionals advise treating them with empathy and compassion and finding them support so that they can deal with their emotions.
Even though the stepkids might have been grieving their mom, they were overstepping by assuming that their stepparent would pay all of their costs. They didn’t seem to understand that the OP was also mourning and that after so many years of distance, they probably had no right to demand even more from them.
Do you think the poster was justified in blocking their stepkids, or do you think they should have worked things out with the young adults? Let us know what you honestly think in the comments.
Folks sided with the poster and felt that they should let the stepkids know exactly how much their mom had been supported financially
