Chores are a very sensitive issue in many households. Quite a few people believe that it’s unfair that they take on the lion’s share of the effort while somebody else gets to enjoy more leisure time. If the right balance isn’t found, it’s bound to lead to a lot of frustration, resentment, and tension among family members.
One anonymous man enraged the AITA online group after sharing how he concocted a plan to get his stepdaughter to not move out so she could continue helping out around the house. His decision? To get her to start paying rent… and then overcharge her in secret. The internet was appalled by this behavior, and many users called the stepdad out. Scroll down for the full story and people’s reactions. Bored Panda has reached out to the author for comment, and we’ll update the article once we hear back from him.
Your children wanting to move out is a bittersweet moment for most parents who will miss them but want them to be independent
Image credits: Volodymyr Hryshchenko / unsplash (not the actual photo)
One man shocked the internet by revealing how he overcharged his stepdaughter for rent so that she'd stay at home and continue pitching in with the chores
Image credits: Oleg Ivanov / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Vitalii Khodzinskyi / unsplash (not the actual photo)
As the post started getting more and more traction, the man added more context about his family life
Image credits: Vitalii Khodzinskyi / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Mindless_Cut7653
The author was very open about the fact that he's not a big supporter of his stepchildren... nor is he a fan of doing chores himself
Image credits: Chris Lynch / unsplash (not the actual photo)
The vast majority of readers were shocked by the stepdad’s approach. And many internet users weren’t shy about calling him out for his behavior.
Some of the things that the man mentioned that stunned the internet included that he didn’t particularly love his stepchildren and that he hadn’t ever done chores in his life.
“I would like to make it clear I have never cleaned my home and will not be starting now. I do not like the noise of the vacuum or the smell of cleaning products,” he wrote.
“Maybe I went too far by saying I have no love for my stepchildren. I want to make it clear that I like them, they just annoy me as they're not my blood,” he added in an update.
Nobody should feel like they’re the only person doing the housework. While ‘perfect’ equality when it comes to household tasks is often impossible due to different working hours and other responsibilities, there still needs to be a willingness to make things (more) fair.
A good rule of thumb is that everyone should pitch in with the chores that need doing at the moment, no matter how much or little they work or study.
Another strategy is to divide up the chores by how much someone (dis)likes them. For instance, if you’re not a fan of vacuuming or using anything related to cleaning products, you could focus on buying the groceries, cooking meals for everyone, taking out the trash, doing the laundry, yard work, DIY and maintenance, etc.
Meanwhile, someone who doesn’t particularly mind doing the dishes or vacuuming can do those tasks more often than those who hate them with a fiery passion.
Housework is a touchy subject, but it's important to find a system that is fair and balanced
Image credits: Curated Lifestyle / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Naturally, there will always be chores that everyone dislikes. In those cases, it’s best to have a rotation so that everyone pitches in (read: ‘suffers’) more or less equally.
And if someone in the family has an issue with the division of chores, it’s very important that they speak up. Sometimes, the other people you’re living with might not realize there’s an issue. Other times, it’s a question of rebalancing everyone’s tasks. But broadly speaking, it’s not a good sign if someone at home doesn’t do any chores, despite working very hard to bring in money.
Even in modern times in developed countries, there’s a lot of unfairness when it comes to chores and leisure time.
CNN reports that based on the findings by the Pew Research Center, women still spend more time on housework and childcare than men, even in egalitarian marriages.
“Even as financial contributions have become more equal in marriages, the way couples divide their time between paid work and home life remains unbalanced,” the Center said.
“Husbands in egalitarian marriages spend about 3.5 hours more per week on leisure activities than wives do. Wives in these marriages spend roughly 2 hours more per week on caregiving than husbands do and about 2.5 hours more on housework.”
As per the study, the only case where men spent more time on childcare was when their wives were the sole breadwinners in their family. However, even in this situation, both partners spent an equal amount of time on household chores.
What are your thoughts on the entire situation, dear Pandas? Do you agree with the majority of the readers that the stepdad’s approach to parenting was completely wrong? What words of advice would you give him if you could speak to him directly?
How would you react if you realized that a family member had been overcharging you for rent? When do you think kids should move out of their parents' home? Let us know what you think in the comments below.
The story took many internet users by surprise, and not in a good way. Many readers called the stepdad out for his toxic behavior
