Disability can make life a lot more complicated than it already is. That is true for both the disabled and the people taking care of them.
However, it’s not always at these misfortunes where the difficulties begin. As this Reddit story tells us, some people can be horrible long before that. But while some get away from them the first chance they get, for others, it takes an unfortunate accident to start seeing the truth. Read down below to learn the whole story.
More info: Reddit
Deciding to stay in a dysfunctional family usually costs more than just time and hurts more than just the adults
Image credits: Jon Tyson (not the actual photo)
This woman said she doesn't want to take care of her abusive and now disabled husband, who never helped her and was verbally abusive to their daughter
Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)
After the accident, the father became absolutely uncooperative, and the daughter suggested sending him away to his relatives, but the mother wasn't sure
Image credits: No_Possession9087
Image credits: Leandra Rieger (not the actual photo)
The commenters were surprised this marriage lasted as long as it has, and while they supported her decision to leave now, they said she also wasn't blameless
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)
After finding out about her mother's post, the daughter made a reply, revealing a more accurate picture of the toxic environment she had growing up
She explained that her father was also physically abusive, and her mother always took his side, which caused the daughter a ton of mental issues
Image credits: YeahSure123_
The commenters were shocked about these horrible conditions that the woman grew up in, with some relating and giving her advice on how to deal with the trauma
A woman came to Reddit to be judged on the decision not to take care of her spouse, who was left disabled after he got into an accident. She said that for the whole 25 years of marriage, she was singlehandedly supporting the family and caring for their home while the husband refused to work and complained about anything that he was asked to do.
He was also verbally abusive and unavailable to their daughter. Over time, this resulted in her developing anger issues and other mental problems, but she has since cut him out of her life.
After the accident, things with this man got even worse. The woman, tired and not being able to find better solutions than sending him away, was feeling hopeless.
Things took a turn when the daughter found out about the post. In her reply, she said that her mom already was back in her ‘martyr’ role, defending her husband from ill words.
The daughter explained that her mother's depiction of the story was quite distorted and that she went through hell while living with her parents. She was constantly insulted, screamed at, gaslighted, and body-shamed, which caused her various problems, like an eating disorder, depression, and panic attacks.
She further said that, unlike how her mom described it, things sometimes got physical. The worst time was when her father tried to break her knee with an iron bar while her mother kept making excuses for him.
People in the comments were shocked. Some who had lived through similar situations were relating and offering advice on how to deal with the current situation, as well the trauma her parents ‘gifted’ her with. Others, while agreeing that the woman is right to want to leave her husband, were bashing her for being an enabler of his horrific behavior and not protecting their child.
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
Dysfunctional families don’t ever turn out into anything good. However, not everyone realizes how constant conflicts between partners can affect their children. That’s why we decided to look deeper into what kind of mark this type of situation at home can leave on them.
According to Bright Side, in these situations, there are many layers that come before physical abuse. While the reflection in children of an abusive relationship might still show physically, it is more likely to come in the form of constantly feeling unwell due to stomach aches and other various symptoms.
The article further tells us about how kids develop in such toxic environments on a more mental level. For example, they may feel guilty and responsible for what’s happening, feeling as if somehow this is their fault and they’re supposed to fix it.
The children in this environment might be pushed aside without parents realizing it, resulting in them and their needs feeling unimportant and ignored. A little further down the road, this may very well lead to the development of depression, low self-esteem, and similar mental issues.
Talking about mental issues, when children are constantly exposed to a rather hostile environment, they become very prone to anxiety, as danger feels as if it’s creeping around every corner in a place where they’re supposed to be the safest, which leaves them with no escape.
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)
To expand even further, Raising Children 101 adds that living in a dysfunctional family can reflect on children’s behavior outside of their home, too. For example, they might find it difficult to concentrate on their studies, leading to low grades and some essential lessons left unlearned.
Bad examples at home also tend to set up these children with relationship issues and loyalty issues. Seeing how their parents act and being forced to pick a side leaves no place for an image of a healthy connection between partners.
Lastly, all of this might come out in the form of bad behavior. The built-up frustration of witnessing all these horrible things and not being able to do anything about it can easily manifest into aggression, at the same time forcing children to seek escapism in early cigarettes, alcohol, and substance abuse, as well as other risky behaviors that children from healthy families often don’t begin until much later.
In the end, we’re once again reminded that toxic relationships usually hurt everyone involved. For one reason or another, many people choose to stay in them. But like in our story, it is not always the people who get to decide that end up being hurt the most.
How do you feel about this story? Do you have any similar examples you want to share? The comment section is wide open, and we’re waiting to hear from you right there, down below!
