Creative people definitely change the world for the better. In fact, just remember what positive emotions you experienced the last time you watched a popular series or movie, looked at a famous painting, or read an outstanding book. Yes, creativity is incredibly cool, it needs to be supported as much as possible... But at what cost?
In fact, for a creative person to achieve fame, a long and sometimes exhausting process is needed, which not everyone is ready to go through. How many times have there been situations where an aspiring author or actor has come into conflict with their spouse simply because they were not ready to be the main breadwinner in a family throughout a very long period of time? And then, you see, it is far from a fact that even the most talented person will become famous and rich...
Something similar happened recently to the author of this post on the AITA Reddit community, user u/Life_Detail4527, whose story has already racked up over 10.4K upvotes and about 1.7K different comments in a few weeks. All in all, reason enough to take a close look at this story...
More info: Reddit
The author of the post works for a tech company while her husband is an aspiring author writing his second novel
Image credits: Haldane Martin (not the actual photo)
So the author of the original post works for a tech company while her husband is an aspiring author. Some time ago, he published a novel at his own expense, which had some success and producers even acquired the film rights. The film, however, was never made, but the couple received a fairly large amount of money, which inspired the Original Poster's husband to further work.
Image credits: Life_Detail4527
When the author was pregnant, her boss offered her a full year of maternity leave on comfortable conditions
The OP recently gave birth to a child, and when she was still pregnant, the employer provided her with a full year of maternity leave on fairly comfortable conditions, without loss of seniority and other salary bonuses. And then, some time after the baby was born, the new mom started taking on some work assignments and started getting involved in the work process. On average, according to the OP herself, it took her about 15 hours a week.
Image credits: Life_Detail4527
Initially, the couple agreed that during the hours that the OP would do her job, her husband would take care of the child, giving her the opportunity to work. The man said he would be writing his book at home, and at the time, according to his wife, it was a pretty good arrangement for both of them. And then the problems started...
Image credits: Life_Detail4527
The husband first volunteered to care for their kid, yet he gradually started calling her more and more to help with the baby
After about a month, the OP's husband began to gradually ignore the child's crying and some of the kid's urgent needs, demanding that his wife take care of the baby, and claiming that she deals with it better. In the end, mom had no choice, and she, of course, did everything - but this began to interfere with her work and her deal with the boss. Of course, the OP did not like this state of affairs very much...
Image credits: Life_Detail4527
At the same time, the wife remained the main breadwinner for the whole family, because the husband was actually unemployed, counting on the fame and big money that awaited him. He refused to find any job, claiming that it would interfere with his creative work, and he also did not want to hire a nanny, because the OP stated that those services would then be funded from their fun budget.
Image credits: Life_Detail4527
The wife is the main breadwinner for the family yet her husband doesn't want to hire a nanny, as that would be funded from the family fun budget
But the man absolutely did not want to give up the opportunity to live a beautiful life in an expensive city, go on vacation, having dinners out and spending money on his own hobbies. At the same time, the man did not at all take into account the fact that all these hobbies were actually covered by the money that his wife earned.
Image credits: Life_Detail4527
And so, one fine day, when the OP's boss offered her a choice between various work options, she made her choice in favor of working in the office, although she could continue to work from home. The result was a tantrum from her hubby, who insisted that his wife continue to stay at home and take care of the child. At the same time, as she herself admits, in the office she has access to a private room and a freezer so she can store milk. She's able to interact with the rest of the team and she finally enjoys the whole environment.
Image credits: Life_Detail4527
The mom decided to return to the office and her hubby threw a tantrum, claiming he feels 'emasculated' by this
The only one left unhappy with this decision was the husband. He stated that the wife is being cruel as the baby needs her. The man then said that babysitting makes him feel 'emasculated' and ended up complaining about the wife's behavior to his parents during the family Thanksgiving dinner. We must say that the OP's mother-in-law supported her son, while the FIL stated that was what the husband signed up for if he didn't want a job. Be that as it may, the family quarrel has continued, and is far from being resolved.
Image credits: Nenad Stojkovic (not the actual photo)
Commenters backed the mom completely, stating that her hubby is actually manipulating her and wants to have 'a sugar momma'
Most people in the comments, however, completely sided with the Original Poster, arguing that she had given her husband options and he's the one making it difficult for the new mom to continue funding her home and family. Also, commenters believe that this is nothing more than an attempt at manipulation by the husband, both clumsy and unsuccessful.
Also, according to commenters, the husband wants all the benefits of a stay-at-home parent without having a job, yet with no cut in fun money. In short, the guy wants a sugar momma type who will bankroll his life and not bother him with the realities of parenthood, people in the comments state.
We're pretty sure you've already made up your own mind about who's right and who's wrong in this particular situation, so please feel free to leave your comments below this post. And if you too have had the opportunity to face or witness something similar, then we look forward to your own awesome story.
Exhausted by family or in-law drama like this one? Visit our Family Dynamics Hub for expert-backed guides on toxic relatives, parenting styles, and personal boundaries.