I had some of the most amazing and helpful teachers in high school, so I am still in contact with a few of them. However, that does not mean I text them every day about my personal life, because that would be just weird, right?
Well, even this woman finds it really creepy that her 43-year-old boyfriend keeps messaging his 19-year-old former student. In fact, she saw some of their recent texts and felt highly uncomfortable as they didn’t seem normal at all. Read on to find out how these messages even shocked netizens!
More info: Reddit
Sometimes, minors don't even realize that the "care" toxic teachers show is actually grooming
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The 28-year-old poster read the texts between her 43-year-old boyfriend and his 19-year-old former student, who went off to college this year
Image credits: Major_Meet_5973
Image credits: EyeEm / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She felt that the texts were not normal at all, as they sounded more than just mentor-mentee, considering how emotionally charged their messages were
Image credits: Major_Meet_5973 / Reddit
Image credits: DESIGNECY / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Major_Meet_5973 / Reddit
She also clarified the 15-year gap between the couple, and that she was also his former student, whom he had pursued when she turned 18
Today’s story is quite irksome because of the original poster’s (OP) boyfriend, who is a high school teacher. The way this man interacts with his much younger former student is truly inappropriate, and some of the things that he messages her even sound creepy. After all, a “nice to see your face” or “missed you” or even a winking face doesn’t seem normal, does it?
The worst part is that they have been chatting like this almost every day, and the poster finds it really uncomfortable. In fact, she even told him so, but the man just brushed off her concerns thoughtlessly and gaslit her into believing that it was normal. Probably feeling confused by his manipulation, she vented online, and folks harshly judged him as being unprofessional.
There were a few netizens who felt that she might be reading too much into it. However, OP clarified that she was also his former student and that he pursued her when she was just 18 and he was 33. Well, these few folks immediately went back on their word and said that the 15-year gap between the two truly gave them the ick, and declared him a “predator.”
To get better insights, Bored Panda interviewed teacher and principal Jyoti D., who has been in the teaching profession for the past 22 years. She claimed, “This definitely does not sound like what a respectful teacher would message their ex-student. As their former mentors, we can of course cheer them on, give career advice, or celebrate milestones, but always keep a healthy distance.”
Image credits: wayhomestudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Our expert also pointed out that many former students are still very young, often just barely out of high school, so the responsibility to keep things appropriate clearly rests with the adult in the situation. According to Jyoti, teachers are the ones with the maturity, authority, and experience to recognize where the boundaries are and to make sure those lines aren’t crossed.
“The power dynamic doesn’t just disappear the day a student graduates, which means it’s on the teacher to maintain professionalism and protect that young person’s well-being. Even if the student tries to be extra friendly, the adults should remember that they are their mentors, not their friends or personal therapists. In the end, it’s important to maintain a respectful bond,” she added.
However, this man just knows no bounds, considering he is not only chatting up the 19-year-old, but also did the same thing with his girlfriend. OP also spoke up about how he has isolated her from her family and friends, so she had nowhere to turn except the internet. Research suggests that gaslighting and isolating their victims are clear signs of an emotionally cruel person.
Folks were also quick to highlight this, and I think they are absolutely right. However, on a positive note, the poster got a reality check from netizens, so she is definitely planning to ditch the guy. She also commented that she has gathered evidence against him and plans to share it with his workplace and reveal what kind of person he really is.
I hope she succeeds, and this predator doesn’t get away with preying on another student. What about you? What would you do in such a situation? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!
Even netizens felt that the texts were highly inappropriate, and they wasted no time in declaring that her boyfriend is a predator
