When you’re a teenager, your bedroom is your sanctuary. It’s likely the only place that you can be completely alone, and the only place that you get to decorate exactly how you like. There’s no need to consider the color scheme Mom chose for the living room when picking which posters to hang on the walls. And nobody gets a say in how many fairy lights should line the walls except you.
That’s why this teen girl was thrilled to turn her bedroom into the room of her dreams. But when her half-sister decided that she wanted the same decorations in her room, she decided that she’d rather not live in that house at all. Below, you’ll find all of the details that the teen shared on Reddit, as well as some of the replies that invested readers left her.
This teen was thrilled to decorate her bedroom exactly how she wanted
Image credits: ShintarTatsiana/Envato (not the actual photo)
But when she was pressured to give her sanctuary to her half-sister, she decided that she'd rather not live in that house at all
Image credits: AirImages/Envato (not the actual photo)
The teen also shared more information on her situation after reading some of the comments
Image credits: pvproductions/Feepik (not the actual photo)
Later, she shared an update on her new living situation
Image credits: throwaway_777890
A teenager's bedroom is the one place where they get to express themself
Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)
Do you remember what it was like to be a teen? Pumped full of hormones and angst, you were likely looking for anything to keep you entertained and happy. Whether that was going to the mall with your best friends, ding-dong ditching your crush, or blasting your favorite album in your bedroom, I hope you look back on those times with fondness.
And if you’re now a parent of a teenager, it’s important to remember what it felt like to be 16 and what matters most to kids of that age. According to a piece Carl E Pickhardt, PhD, wrote for Psychology Today, an adolescent’s bedroom is extremely sacred to them.
Once your child becomes a teenager, they’ll be less interested in having their parents in their room, more eager to keep the door closed, less interested in spending time with the family, and they’ll probably want to turn their bedroom into “a gallery to exhibit changing expressions of an adolescent state of mind,” Dr. Pickhardt notes.
Now, this doesn’t mean that the teenager should be able to do whatever they want, as it’s never a good idea to let dishes pile up until they’re growing mold or play music so loud that neighbors call the cops. But there should be fewer rules for teens to abide by in the comfort of their own rooms.
They don’t need to keep their bedroom spotless every single day, and they should have the freedom to get creative when decorating. Tim Lott wrote a piece for The Guardian explaining why he believes children should be able to do what they want with their rooms, noting that teens are constantly being told what to do in all other aspects of their lives.
Parents can push their teens away by refusing to give them enough freedom
Image credits: EyeEm/Freepik (not the actual photo)
“If my daughter is anything to go by, they work extremely hard at school and have little enough agency when they get home,” Lott writes. “Giving them some control and a space to call their own is psychologically important.”
And when you’re at such a transformative age, it can be extremely difficult to express how you’re feeling through words. So the best way might be to simply plaster your bedroom walls with your own art, posters of bands you love, and Polaroid photos of you and your friends.
“The mess or order of a teenager’s room provides a visual representation of the thoughts that run through their minds and a visual representation of what they hold important and what they hope to achieve,” Tara Anastasoff writes for The Chant.
Most parents should also understand that pressuring their teens definitely isn’t the best way to persuade them to do anything. In this particular story, the mom pushed her daughter to move out of the house by making her feel bad about refusing to give up her room or decorate her sister’s room. As difficult as it may be, moms and dads can’t keep their teenagers on too tight a leash. Or they’ll just want to run as far away as possible the first opportunity they get.
We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation, pandas. Do you think the author made the right move by deciding to live with her dad? Feel free to weigh in. Then, you can find another Bored Panda article discussing similar family drama right here.
Readers unanimously sided with the author, calling out her mother for trying to make her feel bad
