35 Thanksgiving Dinners Where The Main Course Was Turkey And The Side Dish Was Pure Drama

Many of the most memorable Thanksgiving arguments seem to be about trivial things like dryness of the turkey, the proper way to make mashed potatoes, and who gets the last dinner roll. But the data suggests there's often a much bigger issue lurking just beneath the surface.

According to a Axios poll, politics remains the number one cause of holiday tension. They found that a large number of people actively dread the political conversations that are bound to come up, with many families instituting a "no politics at the table" rule that has about a 50/50 chance of actually working. So, while the fight might have started over the gravy, it was probably never really about the gravy.

For those who don't just endure the Thanksgiving argument but actively relish it, the satirical minds at Slate created the ultimate guide on how to not only start a fight but to walk away feeling smug and superior. Their tongue-in-cheek advice is a masterclass in holiday chaos.

Step one: choose your target wisely, preferably a relative who is easily provoked. Step two: come prepared with a few well-rehearsed, condescending phrases. The final, crucial step is to know your exit strategy. Deliver your devastating final point and then immediately announce you have to leave, giving them no chance to respond. It's a deeply unserious guide for a very serious family tradition.

For the generations who would rather avoid the fight altogether, a new and cherished tradition has emerged: the "cousin walk." This is the thinly veiled excuse for the younger members of the family to get out of the house, decompress, and, in many cases, partake in a little recreational “gardening” to make the impending dinner table arguments a bit more bearable.

It’s the modern evolution of "going outside for some fresh air," a sacred ritual that allows for a moment of solidarity and sanity before heading back into the fray. This trend has become so popular, it's now a recognized part of the Thanksgiving cultural landscape, and the Wednesday before Thanksgiving is the dispensary’s version of Black Friday.

The family fight is just one part of a much larger, weirder Thanksgiving tapestry. A survey by Innerbody Research on holiday traditions dug up some hilarious statistics that prove every family is a little bit strange. One similarity they found is that a surprising number of people have had an uninvited guest show up for dinner.

Another laughable one is that the most common "secret ingredient" in a family recipe is, somewhat anticlimactically, just a whole lot of butter. The survey also settled the great debate over the most hated Thanksgiving side dish, with the award for "most likely to be left on the plate" going to the classic, wobbly, canned cranberry sauce.

At the end of the day, after the last piece of pie has been eaten and the final, devastating political opinion has been shared, the Thanksgiving argument is a weird and wonderful part of the holiday chaos. It is a tradition that we simply can’t let go of.

It's a sign that you have a family who feels comfortable enough around each other to be their truest, most unfiltered, and occasionally most infuriating selves. So be thankful for the drama, be thankful for the weirdness, and most of all, be thankful for the sweet, sweet silence when they all finally go home.

Do you have more wild Thanksgiving arguments to share, or are you the one who stirs the pot? Share all the juicy details in the comments!