Most folks would argue that flirting can, in fact, be hard. You have to balance so many spinning plates, to be funny, interesting and not drive the other person away. However, there are always a few dudes out there who intentionally or even unintentionally find ways to make their attempts at flirting into a sort of “one-man-discomfort performance” for the woman he’s talking to.
Someone asked “Girls, what are some things that most guys do that are actually creepy?” and people shared their best (or worst) examples. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to add your own thoughts in the comments section below.
#1
I'm a guy and I think when other guys say "she just needs to get some d**k" that it is the grossest thing ever.
100points
#2
As a guy, I think it's very important to remember that a lot of women aren't trying to be be rude. It's at the point where they just don't want to attract any unwanted attention, which must suck. A comment my wife made once: Men fear rejection, but women fear r*pe or worse.
93points
#3
Thinking a polite rejection means 'put more effort into it and I might say yes'.
No means no.
No means no.
90points
#4
Not most guys but most guys of a certain age.
Insulting other women in an attempt to compliment you. For example
' I like the way you dress, most women these days go out half naked etc'
Often followed by other insulting sweeping statements trying to make the intended target feel special. Such as:
' You're the first woman I've met in a long time that can hold an intelligent conversation' ( usually after unsolicited dull political rants)
'Girls these days get so drunk, don't they have any self respect?' ( you will usually see this same man attempting to take home very drunk women at the end of the night when his horrible compliments have failed)
Etc etc etc
Firstly, putting other women down just makes you look like an a*s.
Secondly how do you know I am not a woman who often goes out 'half naked' and gets smashed and you are not directly insulting me.
Thirdly, suggesting you have not met anyone that can keep up with your conversation either suggests you unfairly think women are stupid or you attract only stupid women, and you are arrogant.
Finally let's not get into the very long explanation of how accusing women of having no self respect in these contexts is usually just sexism and control of women's agency veiled as concern.
Insulting other women in an attempt to compliment you. For example
' I like the way you dress, most women these days go out half naked etc'
Often followed by other insulting sweeping statements trying to make the intended target feel special. Such as:
' You're the first woman I've met in a long time that can hold an intelligent conversation' ( usually after unsolicited dull political rants)
'Girls these days get so drunk, don't they have any self respect?' ( you will usually see this same man attempting to take home very drunk women at the end of the night when his horrible compliments have failed)
Etc etc etc
Firstly, putting other women down just makes you look like an a*s.
Secondly how do you know I am not a woman who often goes out 'half naked' and gets smashed and you are not directly insulting me.
Thirdly, suggesting you have not met anyone that can keep up with your conversation either suggests you unfairly think women are stupid or you attract only stupid women, and you are arrogant.
Finally let's not get into the very long explanation of how accusing women of having no self respect in these contexts is usually just sexism and control of women's agency veiled as concern.
85points
#5
When they walk by and feel the need to grab your shoulders, waist, or hips, and try to act innocent when you call them out on it. I’m 99% sure if a random man held you in place like that in a grocery store aisle you’d feel violated too, dude...
77points
#6
“I know you didn’t GIVE ME your number, but I managed to acquire it without your permission and am using it to ask you out!” If we see each other regularly, ask me for it directly. If we don’t, ask the person you’re getting it from to ask me for permission first. It’s so creepy to just get a text and have to investigate who’s spreading my number around.
69points
#7
Did this by accident the other day.
Outside having a smoke and made eye contact with a girl who lives in my apartment block. Start chatting about normal stuff. Wasn't trying to get her number (wouldn't have said no though) just being friendly.
She finished her smoke before me and I realised I'd sort of positioned myself in her way so she had to either walk around me awkwardly or ask me to move. Suddenly felt really awkward and I apologised as soon as I realised and moved right out of her way.
So yeah, don't block the exit path of whoever you're talking to, even by accident. Makes you feel like a proper creep.
Outside having a smoke and made eye contact with a girl who lives in my apartment block. Start chatting about normal stuff. Wasn't trying to get her number (wouldn't have said no though) just being friendly.
She finished her smoke before me and I realised I'd sort of positioned myself in her way so she had to either walk around me awkwardly or ask me to move. Suddenly felt really awkward and I apologised as soon as I realised and moved right out of her way.
So yeah, don't block the exit path of whoever you're talking to, even by accident. Makes you feel like a proper creep.
66points
#8
Guys my own age (late 20s) usually don't do this, but middle aged men have got to stop f*****g calling me "sweetheart" or "honey". It makes my skin crawl. It isn't respectful or nice, it's just creepy and condescending.
59points
#9
Unless we explicitly ask, don't send us pics of your d**k. It doesn't matter if its huge, we don't want to see some random guys d**k pop up on out phone on our lunch break.
Edit: this has sparked a lot of conversation and "not all men", so I just wanted to clarify my end. I posted this from my own personal experience, and hearing from my younger sister's personal experiences. I know there are many great men out there and don't have a negative view of men overall. But based solely off my experiences on social media, this is the norm. I also work in retail/customer service, which means I'm always nice because I'm being paid to be nice. Of the thousands of customers I've served, I'd say roughly 95% of men are perfectly polite and respectful. 5% will throw in some sexual innuendos or inappropriate comments. Of that 5% I have had maybe 10 people say something or do something that's made me uncomfortable enough to ask for a male manager to deal with. These same men do it to other female front end staff too. One asked for my number and didn't get it. I have not received any d**k pics from customers.
As for male customers misinterpreting my being nice because I'm being paid to be for flirting, it has reached a point where we actually have a code word/phrase set up to page over the intercom to signify that things have become too uncomfortable. Using the code phrase will get a male to come to our tills under the pretense of helping with a technical error with the machine but really just stand there until the customer leaves.
Edit: this has sparked a lot of conversation and "not all men", so I just wanted to clarify my end. I posted this from my own personal experience, and hearing from my younger sister's personal experiences. I know there are many great men out there and don't have a negative view of men overall. But based solely off my experiences on social media, this is the norm. I also work in retail/customer service, which means I'm always nice because I'm being paid to be nice. Of the thousands of customers I've served, I'd say roughly 95% of men are perfectly polite and respectful. 5% will throw in some sexual innuendos or inappropriate comments. Of that 5% I have had maybe 10 people say something or do something that's made me uncomfortable enough to ask for a male manager to deal with. These same men do it to other female front end staff too. One asked for my number and didn't get it. I have not received any d**k pics from customers.
As for male customers misinterpreting my being nice because I'm being paid to be for flirting, it has reached a point where we actually have a code word/phrase set up to page over the intercom to signify that things have become too uncomfortable. Using the code phrase will get a male to come to our tills under the pretense of helping with a technical error with the machine but really just stand there until the customer leaves.
59points
#10
When they sit next to me and they have their arm on the back of my seat. I can't lean back into my chair because then it's like having their arm around me.
55points
#11
Dismissing complaints we make and/or requests to stop something and responding with “but women do that too”. There’s a power differential at work that you are ignoring. Grow up and develop some empathy for other people who are a bit different to you.
54points
#12
When they don't understand personal space.
53points
#13
Your too pretty to _______.
Please don't. Also don't tell me to smile. It just makes me angry.
Edit. Also please stop saying "If you were single we'd totally hook up." No we wouldn't because you creepy.
Please don't. Also don't tell me to smile. It just makes me angry.
Edit. Also please stop saying "If you were single we'd totally hook up." No we wouldn't because you creepy.
53points
#14
"You're prettier when you smile"
52points
#15
Had a coworker who was in a higher position than me massage my shoulders at my desk without my permission. Immediately reported him and he had the nerve to say to one of my coworkers “I didn’t know she didn’t like to be touched.”
So... yeah. That.
So... yeah. That.
49points
#16
Honestly ?? the way we’re talked about. how you talk about women can tell me a lot about the kind of person you are.
47points
#17
I'm a guy myself but I've heard from my GF that some people just get way too close, even while just having a normal conversation. It's an invasion of personal space. Dudes think that just because the girl doesn't move away at once it's ok to be up your face.
No, just because a girl doesn't immediately jump away doesn't mean that she's into you. Some people just want to act polite without escalating an already creepy situation.
No, just because a girl doesn't immediately jump away doesn't mean that she's into you. Some people just want to act polite without escalating an already creepy situation.
44points
#18
PUTTING THEIR HANDS ON YOUR WAIST WHEN THEY’RE TRYING TO GET PAST YOU. If I had a nickel for every guy who’s done this to me I’d be swimming in cash. The thing is, when it’s my boyfriend doing it it doesn’t even register with me because that’s someone I’m comfortable with and am ok with touching me. But SO MANY random a*s dudes do it to me. I first noticed it when I was in high school, I was really heavily involved with theatre and would sometimes be on the backstage crew, guys were really bad about it then. It happens a lot at bars and concerts too. So creepy and annoying.
44points
#20
Hugging me upon first meeting. Last night I had a man hug me upon meeting me, he held me way too long and slid his hands down my body to my butt. It was really uncomfortable, and even worse my friend brushed it off as him being a h***y old man. Not cool!
41points