“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me,” might sound right, but it ignores the power that words have on our mental health. And every word can be a drop in a bucket already full to the brim with unreachable expectations that can easily overflow.
For International Men’s Day on November 19, The Yellow Club, which fights for accessible and affordable mental healthcare for everyone, shared an illustrated post about what we shouldn’t say to men.
Scroll down and have a look, dear Pandas. We’d love to hear what you think about the advice. So share your thoughts about society’s expectations for men to be unemotional all the time in the comments.
The Yellow Club shared a spot-on post about the things that some people say to men that do more harm than good for their mental health
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
Image credits: yellowclubofficial
The Yellow Club pointed out that they wanted to acknowledge the struggles that men face. Including the unrealistic standards of keeping all of their emotions perfectly in check and having to “suffer in stoic silence” when under pressure.
“Let's stop asking men to never show emotions, instead let's ask them how they're feeling. Let's treat men as humans. Emotional, prone to mistakes, fear, uncertainty, and yes, humans who are capable and want to, at times, cry,” The Yellow Club suggests that we stop putting men on a pedestal and look at them realistically. Imperfect. Raw. Vulnerable.
Seeing men as human beings takes a lot of weight from their shoulders. They can then open up and be honest about their thoughts and feelings, instead of hiding behind (seemingly) impenetrable suits of (un)emotional armor.
That’s not to say that toughness, grit, fortitude (and whatever else you call the ability to move past failure) aren’t important life skills to have. They are! And they may help pave the way to success, according to research. However, they might not be the only important character features to have, like some argue.
Furthermore, you can’t automatically expect every man out there to be a master of fortitude, a tower of toughness, and an island of perseverance just by virtue of their gender. Being ‘perfect’ is too much pressure and can do more harm than good. Aim for growth, being better every day, and kindness, instead.
Here's how some Instagram users reacted to The Yellow Club's illustrated post about the expectations we have for men
