Sadly, bullying is still a very widespread problem. Although we often associate the word "bullying" with children and schools, it's vital to remember that children are not the only people who are being bullied or who bully others. But, sooner or later, for bullies comes time for payback. While in childhood you may have felt ‘cool’ by bullying others, you never know when or under what circumstances you may meet these people.
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Well, a very similar payback opportunity appeared to this woman, who received a message from her childhood bully asking for specific information. And simply, she threw all the things that her bully used to call her in her childhood in her face.
More info: Reddit
It’s always nice to get revenge on people who used to bully you, especially with actions that make them ashamed
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
Woman shares that she moved to Japan about 10 years ago and suddenly one of her old bullies reached out on Facebook
Image credits: Satoshi Hirayama (not the actual photo)
She asked for the woman’s help with a few things as she was also thinking about moving to Japan
Image credits: Keira Burton (not the actual photo)
Then the time for petty revenge came and she just threw out all the facts to the bully about the things she used to call her
Image credits: u/AltruisticCableCar
She shares that later she noticed that she was blocked, but it felt incredibly good to throw these facts back in the bully’s face
Not long ago, a woman shared her petty revenge story to one of the Reddit communities. The author finally had an opportunity to throw the facts back in one of her bullies’ faces and she took it. Community members loved this revenge and applauded the woman for it. The post collected over 7.1K upvotes and almost 300 comments.
OP starts her story by sharing that around 10 years ago, she moved to Japan to study and she genuinely was having a blast and loving it there. Then one day, one of OP’s bullies reached out on Facebook and asked her for help as she was thinking about moving to Japan as well. OP shares that she could have easily answered all of her questions in 5 minutes, but she chose the petty revenge route.
So, she replied back asking if she knew her, to which the bully replied that they had class together for years - you know, acting like school buddies. And then the author decided that it was time for revenge and stated “I remember. You used to call me fat and called me the R word a lot.” After that, OP received no answer and noticed that she was blocked. However, despite that, the woman emphasizes that it felt amazing to throw these facts back at her childhood bully as it was 100% accurate.
Community members applauded the woman for reminding the bully of her previous experience and were shocked that she even had the nerve to ask OP for help after treating her this way. “I bet you she must've never been told no her entire life,” one user wrote. “I find it strange that most bullies have a very short memory span of what they said, inflicted or caused that we carry around for decades. Sounds like you were and are living your best life despite her and her bullying!” another added.
Moreover, Bored Panda got in touch with Dr. Jennifer Fraser, who is an expert educator and innovative strategist who strives to change outdated and incorrect opinions about bullying with up-to-date science. She kindly agreed to share her insights regarding empowering experiences when confronting a bully, psychological effects on a person who has been bullied and how to get back on track after experiencing bullying.
To begin with, Dr. Jennifer states that “confronting a former bully eliminates negative outcomes such as a ‘perception of inescapability’ or ‘identifying with the aggressor.’” So when the brain has suffered bullying, it can internalize the harmful comments and the target can develop, as she refers to it in her book The Bullied Brain, a "mind-bully." She adds that the brain aligns with the aggressor as a survival tactic and it cowers, remains inactive and believes it cannot escape as a way to remain safe and secure.
Thus when a former victim speaks up, she expresses power and independence from the bully. “Hopefully, the former target develops an 'empathic coach' within, who works with mind-brain-body to become healthy, happy, and empowered.”
Image credits: EKATERINA BOLOVTSOVA (not the actual photo)
Now, speaking about lasting emotional scars, Dr. Jennifer notes that neuro-imaging, non-invasive technology, has revealed to researchers that bullying often leaves “neurological scars”. Meaning that this is physical damage done to the brain that is visible on brain scans. “Most people do not know that all forms of bullying and abuse, including those that do not touch the body, have the capacity to do serious harm to the brain. That's the bad news,” she shares.
However, there is also good news that the brain is innately wired to repair and recover.
So on that note, as it can be seen in her book “The Bullied Brain”, there are many evidence-based strategies to recover brain health, which is the foundation for mental health. “In the 1980s, we had a fitness revolution and it became well-known that if we exercised our bodies, we would have greater health and happiness. Now it's time for a brain-fitness revolution,” Dr. Jennifer emphasizes.
She adds that we can commit to aerobic exercise, which is excellent for the brain. We can also practice mindfulness, which neuroscientific research documents is brilliant for brain health and recovery. Moreover, it’s important to understand that bullying and abuse are a cycle. Hurt brains hurt.
“The woman in Japan who bullied the other one as a child was likely from an abusive background or she would not have been compelled to hurt another person,” she says. So getting informed about the harm done to brains by abuse would help us better understand and work with children who bully others. “Brain scans reveal that their brains are not healthy and they don't need punishment; they need rehabilitation. They are manifesting mental illness.”
So guys, as Dr. Jennifer Fraser says - “the children who witness or are targeted should be taught that they are seeing a child in pain, not a child who has power.” Bullying is not a way to show off or be cool - it’s quite the opposite.
Redditors applauded the woman for her revenge and shared their experiences with bullies
