A Chinese-Canadian influencer pretended to be her dead sister for half a decade in an attempt to spare her extended family of further heartbreak.
Annie Niu, who went viral on TikTok back in December 2022, posted a video recently explaining her complicated situation.
Her late twin sister, who died of viral meningitis, has been gone for years. But she and her family decided the best course of action when calling her elderly grandparents was to act as if nothing had happened.
Highlights
- Annie Niu pretended to be her deceased twin sister for 5 years to spare her family of heartbreak.
- Annie's grandmother only learned of her granddaughter's passing just moments before her own death.
- Her grandfather still doesn't know about the twin sister's death.
- Cultural difference hold great influence on decisions to withhold bad news from elderly.
- Annie dreams about her late sister every night, keeping her memory alive.
Less than two weeks ago, Annie revealed she finally told the truth to her grandmother before she died in July.
Annie Niu posed as her late twin sister for 5 years whenever calling her grandparents
Image credits: niu.annie
On December 13, Annie posted a video of herself crying, with red, puffy eyes, writing, “You finally told your family that your twin sister passed away five years ago, and they took down every single family photo that had her in it (which is pretty much every photo in their home).”
“I didn’t tell my grandparents and my extended family that my sister passed away,” she began. “It was my dad’s decision. This past July, my grandma passed away and on her deathbed, my dad told her that my sister passed away and that she’s waiting for her on the other side.
“I think it’s because he didn’t want to withhold this information but he also didn’t want to cause them any heartbreak. And, God forbid, they’re 92, something happens.”
Image credits: annie_niu
Her grandfather, who is still alive, still doesn’t know.
After the news broke, her aunts decided to take down any pictures containing her late twin from his house.
“So imagine my surprise when I take my kids to go visit my grandpa and I look on the walls and none of our photos are there,” Annie said.
Annie’s grandmother didn’t know of her granddaughter’s passing until moments before her own death
Image credits: annie_niu
Commenters, unsurprisingly, had a handful of questions at the ready.
“Didn’t they ask where she was for five years? I’m so sorry and so confused,” wrote a sympathetic user.
“Can I ask why they took the photos down? Is that normal or customary? If this question is offensive, I’m so sorry, not my intention. Sorry for your loss ❤️” asked another.
A third recalled a similar experience of theirs, writing, “I understand why you didn’t tell them, I have elderly grandparents too, and we’ve done the same thing. I’m sorry for your loss, I would love to hear some stories about her when you’re ready❤️”
Image credits: annie_niu
Others, however, were a little less understanding.
“This is so messed up, everyone deserves to know and she deserves to be remembered,” commented a netizen.
“why would ur dad do that to ur grandma on her death bed 😭” someone questioned, where another user replied, “Selfishness.”
Most users showed sympathy for Annie’s loss
Image credits: niu.annie
It isn’t ego or negative feelings that drive these sorts of decisions but rather, a difference of upbringing.
In 2022, Annie told her followers that it was a common practice to shield “terrible” news from the elderly in Asian culture and that it wasn’t a “guarantee” they wouldn’t die when being told of these kinds of heartbreaks.
ABC News also reports that speaking openly about death can “do more harm than good,” as it may bring about bad luck, fear, and emotional pain.
“Some cultures have far less emphasis on the individual and individual autonomy but more on relational autonomy and a view of the patient in the context of their family, community, and culture,” said Dr. Nicola Atkin, from the Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre in Melbourne.
Image credits: annie_niu
Accepting her sister’s death, however, doesn’t mean Annie’s forgotten her.
“I dream about her almost every single night so I treat it as I’m spending half of my life with her still, because I see her every night.”
Some people could relate to the heartbreaking experience
