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I was just taking my trash out, and there was a sound I didn't recognize. I turn to look, and there were goats in my neighbor's apartment. She was rather baffled when I asked about her hircine guest a few days later. Turns out, Her BF had rented a bunch of goats to play a prank of his best friend. He felt bad leaving the goats in the truck, so he brought them in the apartment for a few hours, until he packed them back up and drove them away to do the prank, without telling my neighbor.
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Apartment living inevitably creates proximity and these strange encounters are bound to happen once in a while whether you like it or not, thanks to the way the buildings are designed.
We spoke to Quill R. Kukla, a philosophy professor at Georgetown University in the US, who says that “seeing and hearing (and sometimes smelling) things about one another is part of the fabric of urban life.”
“Our current trend of building glossy loft apartment buildings with huge windows, and building them with cheap material that is not soundproof, heightens our access to one another's business.”
Kukla is also the author of ‘City Living: How Urban Dwellers and Urban Spaces Make One Another’ (2021), a book that explores how living in close quarters shapes daily life and social interactions.
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To this day one of us will randomly blurt out "I AIN'T NEVER GONE TO BED!" and both break out laughing.
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People-watching is not just limited to apartment buildings or neighbors. Europeans have been doing it since the 17th century, when cafes became a place to not only have coffee but also watch life unfold. From city streets to public parks, many people enjoy observing human behaviour and social interactions in real time.
It is our inherent need for connectedness and curiosity that draws us in.
“I live in Germany, where yelling at your fellow building residents for misusing shared spaces like halls, courtyards, bicycle racks, and foyers is famously a national pastime. But even the yelling helps us all feel that we are people who share space rather than living in our own private bubbles,” Kukla shared with Bored Panda.
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The sweetest was a couple who would waltz in their very very tiny apartment. They seemed so happy
The weirdest was next door neighbors would take their dog out to their yard so he'd empty his bowels. The thing is they would both follow him around and stand there staring at him silently while holding hands. It was super creepy for some reason.
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However, living in shared spaces also makes us think where the boundary really is.
Kukla believes urban dwellers are smart enough and “know how to deal with proximity.”
“We have distinctive skills for managing one another's comfort zones, knowing how to adjust to one another's pace, knowing when to engage and when to stay out of one another's business, and just generally how to cope with the chaotic intermixing of bodies,” they add.
Research shows that people living near shared spaces often report lower privacy levels and it’s no wonder that many add blinds or reflective glass to reclaim their personal space.
At the same time, being aware of our surroundings, as long as it is harmless and respectful, is simply a part of life in urban spaces.
“Surveys show that urban dwellers are more comfortable with diversity than others… It makes us more tolerant and understanding of the differences between us, and less threatened by these differences,” Kukla says.
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I also worked in a high rise office across from a high rise hotel where I was one day lucky enough to be sat in a conference room in clear view of an attractive very naked man leisurely wandering around his hotel room. I did not pay very much attention to the meeting I was in haha.
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Felt kind of sorry for it because it didn’t look like a very large apartment.