Everyone with younger siblings has been asked whether they’d rather have a brother or a sister. I’m the younger sister, so that never really happened to me, but I’m aware that it’s almost a rite of passage for any older sibling.
Normally, you’d assume parents would take the answers lightheartedly and with a grain of salt — after all, kids can’t choose their siblings’ gender or control how DNA works. But in today’s story, that wasn’t the case. The parents actually shamed their son to the point that it caused some (almost) irreparable damage to his relationship with his siblings. Yes, it’s that crazy.
Read more: Reddit
Every single child gets asked if they either want a little brother or sister, or to choose which one they want, but it's usually in good-natured fun
Image credits: freepik / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Only, a teenager was shamed as a toddler and child for wanting a little brother to play with
Image credits: freepik / Magnific (not the actual photo)
After being called a "psychopath" for not wanting a sister, the boy actually found it difficult to have a relationship with his sisters
Image credits: freepik / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Instead of encouraging a bond between the siblings, the parents blamed the teen for not fostering a good relationship with his sisters
Image credits: Luususs
Instead, they enforced strict gender rules and never allowed the boy to play with the same toys as his sisters
The story comes from the point of view of a 16-year-old, the Original Poster (OP), who decided to ask netizens for some advice. As he explains, he’s the oldest of six kids and the only boy in the family. When his mother was pregnant with the second child, a girl, he apparently cried as a toddler because he wanted a little brother to play with, which is a very natural reaction.
While he was too young to remember or understand what was happening at the time, he later recalls not being happy about having more sisters. In response to this normal (if somewhat irrational) childhood reaction, his mom allegedly called him a psychopath for wanting a brother so badly that he couldn’t celebrate having sisters. She also told him there was “something wrong” with him, and his dad agreed.
This was far from the only time his parents reinforced that idea. According to the teen, he grew up being told to “act like a man,” and the main reason he wanted a brother close in age was simply that he wanted another boy to play with. Eventually, once he realized the age gap would be too big, he stopped caring about having a male sibling. Still, his parents apparently never even let him play with his sisters.
From what he describes, they reinforced gender roles, and his hobbies were never the same as his sisters’. This eventually led to him having virtually no relationship with them. So imagine his surprise when he later heard his parents tell a family friend that it was normal for her child, a girl, to feel sad about not having a sister. As you can imagine, he snapped at them.
Image credits: dimaberlin-1 / Magnific (not the actual photo)
In response, his parents accused him of being intentionally naive and dismissed the whole situation as nonsense. But psychologists suggest that kids, and even toddlers, understand the concept of gender and often show preferences in their choice of playmates. So calling a five-year-old a “psychopath” for wanting a boy to play with is actually a pretty loaded accusation.
In fact, labeling a child that way, on top of enforcing strict gender roles, can affect self-esteem and identity over time, but that’s not all. Studies suggest that sibling bonds are shaped more by parental behavior than by gender itself. So while he may not have been happy at first, a bond with his sisters could have developed naturally, but it didn’t, largely because of how his parents handled things.
And why is that? They reinforced rigid gender rules. With constant pressure to “act like a man” and only engage in certain sports or play with certain toys, emotional development can be affected, experts say. It reinforces the idea that certain activities, jokes, or interests are only for men, creating an unnecessary gender divide. This kind of separation can also lead to social and emotional loss over time.
Netizens, ultimately, didn’t blame the teen for his crashout. Many pointed out that the parents were setting him up not to form a bond with his sisters from the start, even before they were born. Others argued the parents fully believed they were being progressive by criticizing him for not wanting sisters as a kid. So, do you think the teen shouldn’t have called them out in the first place?
Netizens believe the parents were influencing him not to get along with the sisters from the get-go
