51 Weddings That Went Completely Off The Rails, According To Guests

Some very (generic, probably inaccurate term) gothy college friends had a very ‘alt’ wedding, dress code was band tshirts and they walked down the aisle to their favorite screamo band (couldn’t tell you who it was but it fit) and it was really a quite beautiful ceremony.

Except the Bride’s mother who turned up in the dress she wanted to wear as a traditional maid of honor and carrying the wedding dress she wanted her daughter to wear and had to be asked to leave the room because she wouldn’t stop performative wailing about how her daughter had ruined HER day.

The rest of the day was fine, her mother sat in the corner looking for attention that was not granted her, and the couple are still together, some 20 years later and very happy with 3 little goth kids in training. I assume her mother is doing a Miss Havisham routine in the same dress.

She was awful though, the idea that you would turn up purely to disrupt in such a performative manner still makes me shake my head.

I am a guy. My sister got married.

My dad gave a toast at the reception, saying that his daughter, the bride, was like the son he never had.

Cut to all the attendees looking at my brother and me.

At the wedding reception, one of the bride's coworkers proclaimed that she hadn't made arrangements for a place to stay because she was going to pick up a guy at the reception.

She started aggressively hitting on one of the groomsmen and had to be removed from the dance floor. Following that failure, she got incredibly drunk, and ended up locking herself in the bathroom. She was so inebriated at that point that the fire department had to break down the door and pump her stomach on the way to the hospital.

So I guess she did find a place to spend the night after all!

Wedding guest had a GI issue on the shuttle to the somewhat rural venue. Basically soiled herself. She was older and mortified. The venue manager would not let her inside the building to use the bathroom. This poor woman had to sit in the sun in her own poo and wait for a ride. 

I would be livid if I found out that one of my guests was treated so poorly. 

You can't tell me there's never been a child related poo incident or drunk guest puking at a wedding venue. This was an older person with a medical issue. Completely humiliated. Still makes me mad...

Someone tried to propose to his girlfriend.

The best man almost hurled him out of a window.
The bride (thank God) didn't see that, and neither did most of the other guests.

The best man promptly walked the guy out of the hall with a hand over his mouth..

Arrived with my parents and future wife to my cousin's wedding across the country.

Upon arriving two days before the blessed event, we're told we are expected to cater as it's a low budget affair. Fine, guess we're having an adventure. We go to Sam's club and buy a giant bag of frozen chicken and stuff for potato salad and a bunch of mango chutney to put on the chicken. Probably some other stuff too (this was 25 years ago).

We cook the potatoes one saucepan at a time in my other cousin's under equipped kitchen, and make a giant mountain of potato salad. Great.

The reception is in a pavilion at a public park. There's a basic on-site kitchen and the plan is to barbecue the chicken with the chutney and serve it with the potato salad. Great.

The park's refrigerator is broken - it just ices up the coils and doesn't get cold. The chicken is still frozen when it's time to get ready for the ceremony, so we put up the potato salad in the barely-icebox using the chicken as a cooling source and hope the chicken heats up and the potato salad stays cold by evening. What could go wrong.

We get to the ceremony, (btw this is a medieval themed wedding held at 4:20 pm). I'm in the front row with family so I can't visibly laugh. This will shortly become a significant challenge.

The officiant, in his long white robe and long white beard, dramatically until the scroll with the vows, takes a beat, and says "I can't read this." The groom replies "you're holding it upside down." Problem solved, fantastic. Top marks.

Then there's a moment where the officiant says "who will vouch for this man?" and whoever was on vouch duty dropped the ball, so there was a long moment before his mom pipes up "I will" and the ceremony can continue.

Nuptials completed, we head to the reception to get catering. That's when we learn, in quick succession:
* The potato salad is warm
* The chicken is still frozen solid
* They bought 2 bags of charcoal to grill chicken for 75 people
* The groom's band is the entertainment, *with the groom in his lead singer role*. Bride is dancing with her bridesmaids I guess.

Don't really have time to investigate the whole band/dancing situation because we've got chicken to grill. We're running the huge chicken boulder under the sink and breaking off pieces as we can, then grilling them on the anemic heat and serving with warm potato salad. Guests are complaining their chicken is raw, but all we can offer is more raw chicken.

I think I've traumatically blacked out the rest of the occasion.

I don't think anyone passed, but the marriage didn't last.

A guest collapsed and the father of the bride had to perform CPR in his tux on the ground outside until the ambulance arrived. The father was a cardiologist so at least he knew what he was doing.

At the reception, the bride and groom got into a horrible fight, the groom shoved the bride up against a wall by her neck and then all hell broke loose. It was like the entire room erupted into a fist fight, things were broken, people were hysterical. Like a scene from a movie. 90% of the guests spoke Spanish as their first language and I speak very little Spanish so to this day I don’t even know half of what instigated it or what was said.

The mother of the groom showed up wearing a literal, full white bridal gown. When the bride’s maid of honor "accidentally" spilled an entire glass of red wine down the front of it during cocktail hour, the mother screamed, she threw the cake she had on a little plastic plate.

The goofy Peter Griffin-looking groom absolutely demolished his cute, sweet little bride with cake. I’m talking one hand on the back of her head, the other literally grinding cake into her face as she struggled to break free. Her hair and makeup were ruined.

A child got body-checked by a bridesmaid during the bouquet toss. The kid caught it, gets rushed by a bunch of burgundy taffeta, and the bridesmaid rips the thing from the girl’s hands! I was the child, I was 12, it was my cousin’s wedding.

Bartender served children champaign instead of sparking cider.

I was one of those children.

The priest spent a good half hour thanking the bride for choosing to stop living in sin.

Well, I was invited to a surprise wedding. It was advertised as an engagement party/costume party since it was near Halloween. The bride was absolutely HORRIBLE leading up to the actual wedding, which was sort of understandable. I was joking about wearing a hot dog costume and she absolutely flipped out at me and told me I had to promise to wear something upscale—she did this to everyone. She also gave me a job to do, which was bring her desserts.

I showed up and it was pretty clear this was a wedding, not an engagement party. It was awkward as hell because she had her whole bridal party getting ready (she had 4 outfit changes that day) and I went and waited in my car until her sister called me to come (again, awkwardly) hang out.

This isn’t even the worst part. It was at her mother-in-law’s house and like 100 degrees and there was no shade. People were dressed in these black costumes from like 1pm. Finally, at like 4pm the bride and groom came out and announced they were actually getting married that day. His mother immediately started hysterically crying—not in a good way. Because the parents of the bride/groom weren’t prepared to give speeches, they gave the most bizarre and horribly honest speeches.

Her dad, who was a professional athlete, immediately started talking about how her husband had no idea who he was when they met. It was so arrogant and cringey. Then the groom’s father came up and said “so and so is a good boy—he just doesn’t care about professional sports” and then that speech turned into an attack on the bride and her family.

Meanwhile, MIL is still sobbing uncontrollably.

They also spent like 2 hours taking their wedding photos and the bride’s cousin jumped in there with her boyfriend and took a bunch of shots. That really pissed off the bride.

It was such a bizarre and horrible wedding that I actually cried the entire way home, lol! And then for weeks and weeks afterwards, our friend group had to listen to this gal complain about the plethora of things she was pissed about.

My mom can be a real a-hole but one of my favorite things was telling her this was a secret wedding and her response was “Who does she think she is–Beyoncé?!”

Needless to say, a lot of us don’t talk to this woman anymore. It was so embarrassing.

Bride passed out drunk in the bridal suite and the groom decided he “deserved a wedding night” so he spent it with a bridesmaid. That was his argument when caught.

Mother of bride is my Mom’s sister. All 5 of my Mom’s sisters fight bitterly since childhood. If left alone the feud stays on a low simmer. A vindictive sister in law decided to make it her mission to crank it up to a roaring boil THAT DAY. The whole reception was all about the feud. My poor cousin.
Next cousin who got married eloped.

Brother of the groom got wasted on the mic “remember when dad got that chick pregnant in the Philippines and we found out we had a brother?”.

Saw the groom make out with a bridesmaid right after the first dance it got ugly fast.

Pastor gave a long winded and confusing speech during the service that was about all of his wives who had passed away. Like 3 or 4 deceased wives.

I don’t remember the point of that story in relation to a wedding BUT I do remember feeling very uncomfortable and wondering if the pastor was actually responsible for that.

The Bride’s mom getting up to give a speech talking about all of her daughter’s previous boyfriends and how she wanted her to marry all of them.