There are some things that you just don’t do at weddings! For one, you shouldn’t propose to anyone. Next, keep your partying in check. And, whatever you do, try not to dress anything like the bride, so you avoid sparking spicy drama.
Sometimes, despite your best intentions, you can mess up. Internet user u/bitchybarbie82 went viral on the Wedding-Shaming online group after opening up about an incredibly stressful mistake she made. She shared how she showed up at an Indian wedding wearing a big, puffy, white dress, only to realize that the bride was wearing Western, not traditional attire.
Scroll down to read the full story and to get a heavy dose of secondhand embarrassment. Bored Panda has reached out to the author for comment, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from her.
It can be super embarrassing and uncomfortable to realize that you wore a dress that's incredibly close to what the bride is wearing
Image credits: b****ybarbie82
One woman shared how she miscalculated and accidentally wore something that drew everyone's attention at a wedding, in a bad way
Image credits: beautifulmomentstudio23 (not the actual photo)
Image credits: b****ybarbie82
What you wear when attending the happy couple's Big Day is a huge deal. There are a lot of potential pitfalls to steer clear of
If you’re ever in doubt about what (not) to wear, a good rule of thumb is to get in touch with the happy couple, their family, or the team in charge of organizing the Big Day. It’s better to be safe than sorry, especially when it comes to such a super sensitive question as the dress you wear.
According to bridal stylist Gabrielle Hurwitz, there’s one fundamental rule that she goes by when it comes to picking out wedding guest clothing. “I generally feel like if you're having to question what you're wearing, it's probably not appropriate. If you're second-guessing it, it's probably better to do something else,” she explained to Brides magazine.
Hurwitz suggests avoiding a few main things at weddings:
- White clothes
- Pieces outside the dress code
- Jeans
- Wrong shoes
- Dresses that are too revealing
For instance, unless the happy couple outright tells you to wear something white, avoid it. “White is still a no-go, unless it’s specifically requested by the couple. But I do think there’s nuance there,” Hurwitz says.
“If the bride’s a little bit more chill, a white-based print is totally fine—there are so many dresses that have colorful flowers or gingham or stripes, and it’s very obvious you won’t be mistaken for the bride. If you get the sense that the bride would be deeply offended or is very traditional, I think it’s best to avoid anything that could be mistaken as white.”
She suggests that you squint your eyes at your dress, and if it looks at least a quarter white, pick something else to wear to the wedding. Meanwhile, if you wear something light, you have to be prepared that some of the other guests might comment, gossip, and whisper about your outfit throughout the ceremony and reception.
In the meantime, you should avoid wearing jeans, even if the wedding is casual. Put some effort into your wardrobe. Elevate your attire for the night!
And make sure that the shoes you wear aren’t just good to look at—they have to be practical, too. You’ll be spending an awful lot of time wearing them. So, balance aesthetics with functionality.
Image credits: Marcel Strauß (not the actual photo)
Wearing anything close to white is a bad idea in Western weddings, and you should avoid picking a red dress in Indian, Pakistani, and Chinese weddings
Hurwitz also has some practical advice about dresses. For example, she told Brides magazine that if the wedding is happening in a religious institution, it’s not appropriate for your clothing to be “super revealing.”
She suggests that guests focus on outfits that show off one of their best features, instead of all of them at once. “If you're going to do a plunging neckline, the skirt should be longer. If you're going to do an open low back, maybe the neckline is higher. If you're going to do something short, maybe it's more conservative up top. Choose your moment to be revealing, rather than having everything out on display.”
Bridal brand The Own Studio co-founder Rosie Williams told Vogue that the best wedding outfits are balanced: they incorporate a polished, chic look without looking over-the-top or clashing with the dress code.
“While the dress code at weddings has definitely relaxed, making an effort is still super important—ultimately, the couple [will] see it as a sign of respect that their wedding is meaningful to you and that you appreciate the significance of the day,” she says.
You should also generally avoid wearing red at Indian, Pakistani, and Chinese wedding ceremonies, where the bride traditionally wears this color.
Williams states that you should avoid wearing white at Western weddings and skip pale colors that might look white in photos. Meanwhile, when it comes to super-short hemlines and low-cut dresses, everything depends on the context.
“A shorter hemline doesn’t have to mean less sophistication; it’s all about choosing the right fabric, fit, and overall aesthetic,” Williams told Vogue. “Low-cut necklines are generally a no-go, but it does depend on the couple, the type of wedding, and the venue.”
The internet user’s story was very popular with the Wedding-Shaming crowd. At the time of writing, her post has 20k upvotes and north of 580 comments.
What are your thoughts about the entire wedding drama, dear Pandas? Have you ever been to a wedding where one of the guests had worn something similar to the bride’s dress? What would you do if you realized you were the one who made that mistake?
What’s the biggest wedding drama that you’ve personally witnessed? What’s your favorite outfit that you ever wore to a wedding? Share your thoughts and experiences with everyone else in the comments at the bottom of this post.
Image credits: Samantha Gades (not the actual photo)
Later, the author answered some of her readers' questions and shared more context
Some netizens were impressed that the woman had the courage to share her tale. Here are their reactions
Some folks felt inspired and shared similar wedding stories of their own
