Being cheated on by the person you love most in the world is one of the worst things that can ever happen to you. It’s a deep betrayal. And it can traumatize you for years. Some folks try to fix their relationship. Others try to heal and move on. And still others will decide to get revenge.
One man detailed how he decided to get ‘pro revenge’ after uncovering his wife’s secret affair with his best friend. Feeling completely devastated, the man decided to ruin both of their careers with some very public humiliation. Scroll down to read his full story, an update, and the internet’s reactions.
One of the most painful things that can happen is if your significant other cheats on you. It's even worse when it's with your best friend
Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
This man revealed how he got revenge after uncovering his wife and his BFF's secret affair
Image credits: Vitaly Gariev / unsplash (not the actual photo)
The author answered some of the most frequent questions people asked him
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Infidelity can be a deeply traumatizing event
Verywell Mind stresses that you should not go around seeking revenge against your partner or anyone else after you uncover the affair.
“Being betrayed can make you feel extremely angry. In this state, you might want to lash out by speaking negatively about your partner to friends or on social media, or even consider having an affair yourself.
“While these actions might provide temporary satisfaction, they can keep you in a state of anger and prevent you from focusing on healing and moving forward, whether alone or together.”
Furthermore, while you’re in the middle of this emotionally devastating situation, it might be for the best if you keep the details of what happened private. You may want to keep some things private from your family and friends until you decide how to proceed.
The desire for revenge is natural and understandable because you are hurt and want to see justice done. However, it isn’t healthy. Getting revenge won’t magically solve your problems or restore your relationships to what they were before.
The best ‘revenge’ is, as simple as it sounds, a life well lived. Healing from being cheated on is a difficult, time-consuming process, but it is possible. In some cases, you’ll have to set your ego aside and ask a therapist to help you process and reframe your experiences. The hope is that you’ll be able to accept what has happened, rise above it, and grow stronger as a person.
Healing and moving on from being cheated on can be difficult. It's okay to ask for help
Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
But all of that is easier said than done. Betrayal can be viewed as a type of interpersonal trauma. And it can haunt you for months and years. There is also some overlap between being cheated on by your partner and having PTSD.
Specifically, research shows that roughly between a third and two-thirds of people who were cheated on and learned about the affair suffer serious mental health symptoms.
“Between 30% and 60% of betrayed individuals experience symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, and anxiety to clinically meaningful levels.”
Furthermore, in some cases, victims of cheating can develop post-infidelity stress disorder, an anxiety disorder linked to nightmares, trauma recall, rumination, crying, ongoing stress, numbness, isolation, withdrawal, trust issues, hypervigilance, avoidance, and relationship difficulties.
Again, seeking help from a therapist can be very useful during extremely difficult times like this. It’s not a sign of weakness to ask for help.
We’d like to get your perspective on this sensitive topic, Pandas. What would you do if you found out that your significant other had been cheating with your best friend or family member? Have you ever had someone from your social circle go after your partner? If you’ve ever been cheated on, what was your healing process like? What relationship red flags are you most wary of?
The man shared more details about the drama that was imploding his marriage
The story went viral, and many people wanted to share their advice and perspective
A few years after the affair, the man shared an update about how his life had changed
Image credits: rawpixel.com / freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: wafflesareforever
He then answered people's questions and gave some more context
Here's what the internet said after reading the man's life update
