Most of us associate solo trips with single people. But parents need some quality alone time, too! In fact, 77% of Americans believe that mom and dad should go on trips without kids. What's more, experts say that parents should travel without each other as well – it's a great way to reduce everyday stress and friction in the relationship.
One young family had a similar arrangement, but one day, the dad sprang up his solo trip plans on the mom unexpectedly. Since they didn't have a full-time nanny and had 7-month-old twins, the mom felt it was too early for him to leave the family alone. But who do you think was right in this situation?
A mom of three rejected her husband's plans to go on a solo trip and leave her alone with kids
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"We don't have full-time child care, and it's honestly just a lot with the 3 kids," she defended her decision
Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
The couple take turns having me-time and the guy is a good dad, overall
Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: A. C. / unsplash (not the actual photo)
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Solo traveling can increase relationship satisfaction in marriages
Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Solo traveling isn't just for single Millennials and Zoomers anymore. A 2024 survey by Skyscanner shows that almost a third of women and more than a third of men who travel alone are married. What's more, 31% of solo travelers even have children.
Going on a solo trip can be important for couples. Psychologist Shauna H. Springer, Ph.D. writes for Psychology Today that solitary travel can increase marriage satisfaction. She says that marriages may need both periods of attachment and detachment.
"The support of my need for moments of complete autonomy is one of the most precious gifts my husband gives me within the context of our marriage," she shares about her own experience. Springer believes that couples need to spend some time apart just as much as they need to be together.
"Attachment, even that which imagines it is selfless, always lays some burden on the other person," she quotes author May Sarton.
Kids can make solo traveling harder, but it's still doable with the right arrangements
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When there are kids in the picture, parents may need that time off even more. And, surprisingly, the children benefit from their parents going on solo trips too. Traveler Katie Black shares her own experience as a single mom, and says that it's okay for parents to take back something for themselves.
"It's easy to get fully immersed in parenting, but it can be limiting. By taking time to travel alone, you return with a different perspective that'll enrich both you and your children," Katie writes in her blog.
Just like the couple in this story, Katie and her co-parent make arrangements to accommodate each other's solo travels. "He rearranged his work hours so he could cover childcare for my holiday (I did the same for him when he traveled abroad earlier in the year)." Katie also shares that her mother helped watch her boys two times a week.
So, no – taking solo trips isn't entitled behavior neither coming from the father or the mother. The key is to openly communicate about whether now is the right time to go solo traveling. Perhaps the dad could schedule his solo trip for a few months into the future?
Surviving the six weeks of summer holidays can be hard for parents, so here are some tips
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For parents who work as educators, summer can be one of the most challenging times of the year. Luckily, last year, The Sun UK shared some advice from experts on how to make it through the six weeks of UK summer school holidays, and we present it to you here.
- Get active. Kids need to get their energy out, so consider outdoor activities such as cycling, walking, rollerblading, or skateboarding, etc. What's more, the summer is the ideal time to soak up some Vitamin D, since most of us are deficient during winter. Just make sure the kiddos are wearing plenty of sunscreen!
- Don't be afraid of boredom. Even if you plan lots of activities, don't shy away from kids getting bored. Parenting expert Liat Hughes Joshi told The Sun UK that boredom triggers creativity and imaginative play. "Ride out the pleas of boredom. Counter it with comments such as, 'What do you think you could do?' and maybe have a list of 'I'm bored' activity ideas on the fridge."
- Don't rely on screens for a digital babysitter. However tempting it may be, summer is a great time for kids to go outside, soak up the sun, and literally touch some grass. Experts recommend banning screens altogether at certain times, like during dinner.
- Create a routine. Children need school as it provides them with a set routine which they thrive on. "Children get grumpy, test boundaries and become challenging when routines are broken," pediatrician Dr. Tamara Bugembe told The Sun. So, even in summer, try to stick to at least regular mealtimes and bedtimes.
- Have some time away from each other. Just like the dad in this story, some parents can have just too much of their kids. Experts advise looking for summer workshops and day camps. That way, both the parents and the kids can have time away from each other.
The parents currently have a part-time nanny only, so the dad's decision blindsided the mom
Most people felt it wasn't fair to leave the mom alone with three kids in this situation
Others thought that if the mom gets to travel often, the dad should get some time off, too
