A woman’s recent encounter with a man at the gym left her feeling quite shaken — but it seems as though the Internet isn’t quite sure what all the fuss is about.
Adult content creator Violet Starr uploaded what she deemed to be an inappropriate interaction on TikTok last week, using it as an example of why so many women find themselves in undesirable situations while working out.
Highlights
- Violet Starr filmed a video in the gym that was meant to show harassment — but commentors didn't buy it.
- The video showcased a man who complimented her on her physique.
- Netizens thought Violet was overreacting, and instead pointed fingers at what she may have been wearing.
- A psychologist noted that gyms are often intimidating spaces for some women.
“This is why I don’t go to public gyms anymore,” read the white text overlaying the clip.
A woman's claim that a man harassed her in the gym quickly backfired
Image credits: missvioletstarr
In the video, the influencer filmed herself as she walked down a brightly-lit hallway, approaching two other gymgoers on the side.
As she got closer, one of the men looked up, smiled and asked, “Excuse me, what are you, like a teacher?”
After Violet clarified she wasn’t, he continued, “Because you’re so fit, beautifully fit, and you work out so hard, I thought maybe you were a [personal trainer] or something.”
Image credits: Anastase Maragos / Unsplash (Not the actual photo)
Sounding visibly uncomfortable, the content creator simply replied with, “No, I’m not,” before the video abruptly ends.
It certainly attracted attention, garnering over 108,000 views since its posting — but it wasn’t the kind of attention Violet had hoped for.
At the time of writing, she had turned off all her comments, but Herald Sun was able to report what a few of them read, as it seemed like netizens were trying to accuse her of making a big deal out of an “innocent chat.”
“[She goes] to the gym in revealing costumes with the intent of provoking a reaction from men so [she] can play the victim,” one person said.
Many netizens brought up the outfit Violet was wearing — although she never filmed herself
Image credits: missvioletstarr
“It’s the cleavage trap,” another claimed, saying, “baggy, unattractive loose clothing” was the key to staying unbothered. “Women wear plunging, open necklines — then complain if a man looks.”
Someone else agreed, “These women put on display what mother nature has designed to attract male attention and then act surprised when it works. It’s all an act.”
A fourth had an issue with the interaction being on video in the first place.
Image credits: missvioletstarr
“As a man, any woman trying to film me (something that’s an enormous invasion of privacy and I would never consider doing) at a gym is going to be viewed by me as a predator with ulterior motives.
“That’s because any human who actually feels uncomfortable or threatened would leave, not intentionally interact with the person for the purpose of putting it on the internet.”
Reportedly, Violet had noted that this particular incident was on the tamer side, but wanted to use it as a way to highlight more intolerable interactions she’s had at the gym previously. It is unclear whether this took place before or after the barrage of accusations.
One user pointed at the content creator's decision to film the interaction in the first place
Image credits: missvioletstarr
And while she did receive her fair share of hate comments, a few people empathized with her, saying that they have also faced similar situations.
The huge divide between the two sexes while working out is a startling reminder of how differently men and women tend to view exercise spaces.
Melbourne psychologist Carly Dober explained to news.com.au that gyms are typically “very masculine” areas.
“Many men, especially in male-dominated spaces, do not truly understand how intimidating it can be for some women,” she said.
Gyms were considered "very masculine" spaces
Image credits: Brock Wegner / Unsplash (Not the actual photo)
“If we are giving him the benefit of the doubt — he may have been trying to connect with her and meant nothing untoward by it, but how this is received from her perspective, and someone else’s on the internet, is a completely different story.”
Data reported by Run Repeat in 2022 put this perfectly into numbers.
According to a study, almost 56 percent of women reported having faced harassment during their workouts. Another 69 percent said they felt unsafe or adjusted their behavior after receiving unwanted attention from men.
To make matters more difficult, sharing these interactions online is no easy feat.
Image credits: missvioletstarr
Social media platforms consist of a wide variety of differing opinions, but a prominent one is a phenomenon known as “victim blaming.”
In these scenarios, some people will tend to focus on blaming what a woman is wearing rather than hold another accountable for their actions.
Very Well Mind reported that this mentality is a way for victims to cling to the belief that the world is a fair place.
“Sometimes it’s easier to convince ourselves, ‘If I dress conservatively, this won’t happen to me again.’ Or, ‘If I didn’t drink so much, I would have been able to fend off my attacker,” wrote the outlet.
Many comments did not take Violet's side in the situation
