Having your significant other cheat on you is a horrible feeling. Even worse? Realizing that you’ve been in a relationship with someone who’s actually married. And what do you do if your supposed partner has gotten you pregnant?
It’s a nightmare scenario, and it’s something that internet user u/throwRA-idkwhattosay went through. The woman, who was days before birth, turned to the ‘Relationship Advice’ community for advice after realizing that her older boyfriend was, in fact, still married and cheating on them both. Scroll down for the story in full, including a major update from the author.
Having a child with the person you love should be a happy moment. Infidelity can wreck this beautiful time
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An anonymous pregnant woman begged the internet for help after discovering that her boyfriend had a secret wife
Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: throwRA-idkwhattosay
Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)
There are many small signs that your partner may be having an affair
There are times when romantic relationships require you to go long-distance with your for a time. However, it feels like a massive red flag if your long-term partner won’t live together with you after getting you pregnant, offering you sweet promises without actually moving in. Actions speak louder than words.
It can be difficult to tell for certain that your partner is having an affair unless they outright admit to it. However, you usually have a gut feeling that something’s off. And it usually has to do with sudden changes in your significant other’s behavior.
To be fair, there are many potential reasons why your partner might behave differently: maybe they’ve been super stressed at work recently, there’s a lot of new tension with their family or friends, they have new responsibilities, they’ve been feeling physically unwell, etc.
But some signs can mean that they may be cheating on you. For example, you may be suspicious if your significant other suddenly changes their attitude toward you, starts avoiding you, has an increased interest in their appearance, or starts spending far more time away from home.
According to Verywell Mind, other signs that your partner might be cheating on you are lying to you, being overly protective of their phone and computer, having sudden money issues, changing how intimate they are with you, and accusing you of being unfaithful to them.
Other potential red flags include criticizing you more often, having more arguments, having low self-esteem, being more negative, and getting defensive if there’s talk of infidelity.
It’s the speed of these behavior changes that is the most suspicious. And, of course, it’s important to remember that these shifts in attitude may be due to other problems and not necessarily due to an affair.
As her story started getting more and more attention online, the woman shared more context about her situation
Many internet users genuinely wanted to help the mom-to-be. Here's their advice for her
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There are a lot of different factors that increase the likelihood that someone might cheat on their partner
According to WebMD, people having affairs often cheat over the internet via their phone or computer. So, a sudden overprotectiveness of their devices or getting defensive about the time they spend on them might be a sign that they don’t want you to know who they’ve been in touch with.
There are numerous reasons why people cheat. Some have affairs simply because they have the opportunity to do so. Others can have unmet emotional or physical needs at home, so they look to other people to satisfy them.
As per Verywell Mind, people who have poor self-esteem, are insecure, have childhood trauma, are narcissistic, misuse substances, and have a history of cheating are more likely to be unfaithful.
The risk of cheating also increases if there is a disconnection between partners, financial pressure, low compatibility, a lack of communication and respect, or physical or emotional violence at home.
Some individuals cheat because they are unhappy, feel unappreciated, want to be desired by other people, or have low compatibility with their partner. Others might simply be bored… or they want to ‘get back’ at their significant other, so they have an affair to get revenge.
Unfortunately, the viral story author’s account got suspended, so we were unable to reach out to her for further comment. According to her latest updates, not only was her baby doing well, but her (now ex) boyfriend’s wife actually got in touch with her and was planning to divorce the man.
What advice would you give the author of the story if you could talk to her face to face, dear Pandas? Have you ever been in a situation where you found out that your partner was cheating, juggling multiple relationships? How would you react if you were in the author’s shoes?
After a while, the author shared the first of two important updates with her readers
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Image credits: throwRA-idkwhattosay
In a follow-up, she explained how the secret affair got out and what happened to her ex-boyfriend's wife
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Image credits: throwRA-idkwhattosay
Here's what some people told the woman after her latest update
