A TikTok influencer named Shaely discovered her boyfriend was consuming manosphere content when she went through his YouTube history and recorded her reaction in a viral clip posted on February 20.
Manosphere notably refers to interconnected online communities that focus on masculinity and men’s issues and often push misogynistic or anti-feminist rhetoric.
Highlights
- Shaely, a TikTok influencer, found her boyfriend watching manosphere videos online and realized she needed to get out.
- Some social media users praised her for checking what her boyfriend was watching, while others criticized her for invading his privacy.
- Research warns that social media can push young men toward toxic content like this when they seek videos related to loneliness or self-improvement.
When Shaely found out her boyfriend was watching videos on “how to manipulate and control women 24/7,” her reaction ranged from “What is this?” to “I gotta get out of here. I’m in danger.”
Netizens agreed with her in the comment section of her post, with one writing, “This is worse than cheating.”
TikTok star alarmed by boyfriend’s toxic online habits receives outpouring of support from followers
Image credits: slimshaely/Instagram
Shaely stood in front of her boyfriend’s YouTube history pulled up on a giant computer screen. According to her, his other recent watches included “Put her to work” and “Women want to care for you.”
She pointed out that he had watched the entire video, which made the situation more unsettling.
Image credits: slimshaely/TikTok
The influencer’s video, which racked up 3.4 million views, was quickly flooded with messages expressing concern for her, even though she exposed her boyfriend’s YouTube habits with a laugh.
Image credits: slimshaely/TikTok
“You’re in danger. It’s not funny,” wrote one, while another commenter, who identified as a therapist, added, “I love your sense of humor and ability to laugh, but you may actually be in danger. Please be safe.”
“He is a closeted misogynist,” wrote a third.
“Men put effort into manipulation and none into treating women like human beings,” a fourth lamented.
“This is why I am pro-women snooping,” asserted the next.
Shaely assured her viewers that she had ended the relationship
In a follow-up video posted on February 21, Shaely described her boyfriend, whose name remains unknown, as kind and normal, saying anyone who knew him in real life would “not suspect he was watching these kinds of videos.”
“I am no longer with this man. We do not live together, and I confronted him,” she added.
Their breakup, Shaely said, surprised many who knew them.
According to her, some of the guy’s co-workers asked why they split. At the time, she admitted she made excuses like “he was too nonchalant for me,” rather than revealing the real reason.
Image credits: slimshaely/TikTok
Now, she expressed, she felt it was important to be honest about what she discovered.
Shaely noted that beyond the content on manipulation and learning about putting women to work, her ex had been watching videos about how to flirt with women he considered “out of his league,” which further contributed to her decision to leave.
He is now pursuing much younger women, specifically 20-year-olds, and appears to be applying what he learned from the videos, she noted.
Many praised Shaely for her decision to break up, with one saying, “I admire how swiftly you left him. Leaving someone manipulative like this is really hard to do.”
Another added, “The fact that he was watching them for future education is somehow even crazier.”
Shaely, however, also received flak for what some perceived as invading her boyfriend’s privacy and overreacting
Image credits: slimshaely/TikTok
“Going through someone’s phone and internet history falls under domestic ab*se,” one opined, while another added, “He is manipulating her with videos, but she is cyberstalking him.”
“Danger??? Poor little lamb!” mocked a third.
Image credits: slimshaely/Instagram
Another called her a “drama queen.”
A fifth, meanwhile, called Shaely’s video “staged.”
Manosphere content is favored by social media algorithms, according to research
Image credits: Nexa/Adobe Stock (Not the actual photo)
A 2024 study from University College London and the University of Kent found that young men encounter highly misogynistic narratives within just a few days of searching for content related to loneliness or self-improvement.
Image credits: Alex/Adobe Stock (Not the actual photo)
Vodafone UK’s research, meanwhile, suggests it can happen even faster, with someone stumbling across such content within just 30 minutes of being online.
A report by UN Women, examining the concept of the manosphere, noted that it is normal to seek community in digital spaces, but that this should not occur by learning to demean women.
"Congratulations on your escape," a netizen expressed
