There are varying degrees of betrayal by friends. Of course, the more severe ones can instantly sever ties, but even the less extreme cases that ruin trust can ultimately damage the relationship forever.
This story is more of the latter, where a woman did a “good friend” a favor by saving her from her stressful landlady problem. However, what she got in return as a thank you was a $500 charge for supposed “house sitting” services.
She is now asking the internet whether her refusal to pay makes her the jerk of the situation.
All forms of friend betrayal can immediately damage the relationship forever
Image credits: lucigerma/Envato (not the actual photo)
A woman’s act of kindness for a “good friend” came with a hefty $500 price tag
Image credits: dmytros9/Envato (not the actual photo)
The two have since been at odds, as the author turned to the internet for some answers
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A friendship with a “taker” brings no upside and may need to be re-evaluated
Toxic friends come in different forms, but most experts will likely classify them as people with narcissistic tendencies, even personality disorders.
Psychologist and internationally renowned Gestalt therapy trainer Dr. Elinor Greenberg mentioned three basic narcissistic friendship patterns, and one of which is the “taker.”
She describes this person as the type who would shamelessly ask for inconvenient favors, loans they will never pay back, and waste hours of your time whining and complaining about their problems.
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And unlike the other two patterns of narcissistic friendships, namely givers and “fair exchangers,” Dr. Greenberg says there is no upside in having a taker in your life.
“There is no upside unless you are very lonely, and any company is better than none at all,” Dr. Greenberg wrote. “Takers create a lot of extra work, are careless with other people’s belongings, and they do not reciprocate.”
Dr. Greenberg says rifts are almost a guarantee with a narcissistic friend, which requires an assertive approach. Otherwise, the outcome can only lead to resentment.
“If you want to be friends with someone with a narcissistic personality disorder, you need to be realistic about what to expect and whether the upside of the relationship is sufficient to balance the downside,” she said.
The $500 charge is definitely a red flag that the author shouldn’t take lightly, as similar, even much worse incidents can happen in the future. This may very well be a wake-up call for her to re-evaluate the friendship and even consider distancing herself.
The woman answered questions from readers
Many people sided with her and offered suggestions
